Release the Hounds

Guest Game Recap - Jules Winnfield

2009-07-21T21:51:00.005-04:00

I'm not sure if you noticed, but last week Jules Winnfield was watching our game against the Big Kahunas. Apparently, he has found his way to Toronto during his whole "walking the Earth like Caine in Kung Fu" deal.

He was so impressesd, he asked if he could make a comment about the evening:

OK, so he was only there for The Big Kahunas BBQ, and didn't really watch any of the game. As long as he's not reciting Ezekial 25:17 to me, he can say whatever he wants.

This week's game

We're up against Oxygen Hazard, who we beat the last time we played, 17-5. Weather was definitely a factor that game, so we'll want to come out hard and assert ourselves.

The game is at Michael Power. It turns out they are naming schools after toys now...

I hope nothing happens

2009-07-08T13:02:00.004-04:00

Tonight we are playing the formidable Banana Cream Pie at Flemingdon Park. From looking at their roster, they are pretty stacked, so we'll see how it goes. But hey, we have 10 people coming, so I'm sure we'll do alright.

Fear not: Grandma the Clown has some inspirational words for us about BCP.

The key to success for tonight: scoring more points than them.

Just wait til you see the pool

2009-06-24T11:40:00.006-04:00

Tonight's game location is brought to you Toronto Civic Employees Union Local 416 CUPE. Thanks to the strike our scheduled game for Sunnybrook has been moved to ~~Manitoba~~ Etobicoke.

Our opponent is the infamous "COOL" team, who thinks that counting on their looks will help them win games. Of course, we know most of these players from Tundra, as well as Liver Punch, who we played a couple of times indoors. Those games were a lot of fun (for us) so let's do more of that tonight.

COOL is probably best known for their love of Schlitz Beer. The thing is...whenever I think of Schlitz, all I think of this old SNL commercial...

Schmitt's Gay Beer-Adam Sandler and Chris Farley

Top of the world...

Beware of...uh...Oxygen

2009-06-16T23:25:00.005-04:00

Yes, I'm back on the blog, sharing my insights into our weekly opponents...until I get bored with it again. But at least this blog is still going (*cough*).

Part of the reason for the blog stagnation is due to the search for subs. My weekly hunt has lead me to recruit a new General Manager whose job is two fold:

a) Make sure everyone plays each week.

b) Find subs if Plan A fails.

Obviously, it was tough to find someone who had the extra time, but I'm pretty sure after this week we'll be back to 100% attendance. He just has this "way" with people.

Before I announce who it is, I just wanted to say some things about this week's team to beat, Oxygen Hazard. I'm sure some of you will remem-ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

For us is bad news bears (Walter Matthau)

2009-03-10T11:11:00.006-04:00

There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures...and the Dutch.

Seriously, that was a bit of a whooping last night. The offense was pretty solid, but defensively it seemed like they could do whatever they wanted. A lot of that is due to the fact that they are an excellent good team who has many different throws in their arsenal. Any ideas on what we could have done differently? Do you think the change to a straight-up mark helped?

Alcohol or Boxing?

2009-03-02T14:24:00.006-05:00

Tonight's game is against Liver Punch, who we might also know as Tundra. We beat them pretty badly a few weeks ago, and I'm sure they aren't too happy about it.

Watch out for those low left hooks!

SNOWPLATE!

Of course, a Liver Punch could also refer to what's going to happen this weekend in Sudbury. The Hounds on Ice are looking to repeat as champions, despite all of the damage we'll be doing to our livers on Friday and Saturday...more to come on that...

Not at all like the Amber Fey

2009-02-23T16:17:00.006-05:00

For tonight's game, we are playing against Green Fey again. After tying them the last time, a win would be nice.

I had no idea what a Green Fey was, so I did a little search. I thought it might have something with 30 Rock and Tina Fey, but what I found was much more complicated. And lame.

Apparently this is from an on-line, post-apocolyptic role-playing game called Gainar. "In a world where darkness looms, and the shambling dead outnumber the living, a handful of heroes can rekindle the dying light." Who do they think they are...Dylan Thomas?

I hear the cleats in this game are awesome though...

So, what's a Fey?

"Base Movement of 9//, Base AC of 9, non-natives to Gaianar, full flight capability, able to assume an ghostly, energy form for limited periods, able to fire wind blasts at foes, motion-vector detection, ultra-vision, very vulnerable to iron, suffers an experience penalty."

But that's not all. Each different colour Fey is different (duh!):

"Unlike the amber Fey, insanity made the green Fey nasty. They hate all ground-bound races on Gaianar, and will seek to destroy any Human Priest, regardless of their faith. Moreover, they view the Dwarven race as a non-sentient animal race and use them for slave labour and/or food. Green Fey never become Priests of any kind, but instead are Thieves, fighters of all sorts, and hired assassins. Green Fey are always Satanic, and have forsworn supernatural practices to the point that they now have a 25% resistance to all spiritual powers."

Like Towelie, I have no idea what's going on. But I guess we have to be mindful of these full-flight capable, insane, satanic aliens of Gaianar, whatever the hell that means.

[Of course, I'm sure Gaianar players would be like "What the fuck is Ultimate?" if asked, so who am I to judge?]

Why so tired?

2009-02-03T15:28:00.005-05:00

I was going to do a complete breakdown of last night's victory, but not anymore since I was distracted by this little bit of awesomeness:

I'll never look at balloon animals the same way...

A Tribute to the Return of Lyanne

2009-01-26T09:43:00.008-05:00

Contortionist.

Crank dat

2009-01-20T14:16:00.005-05:00

Since we're playing Energy tonight at 10:00, I am reminded of a movie that I recently stumbled upon a few weeks ago: Crank. It's about a guy who has been poisoned, and the only way he can stay alive is to keep his adrenaline flowing. Basically, he has to keep running around doing badass things or else he dies.

This movie pretty much has everything on my personal checklist for awesome movies:

- Boobies? Check. (Christian and Joel, I know this is important to you too)
- Dude from the Transporter, doing Transporter-like things? Check.
- Guy gets his hand cut clean off? Check.
- Lots of guns and car chases? Check.
- Couple having sex in the middle of Chinatown? Check.

All in all, an energy-filled 90 minutes...until he dies. Shit! Did I just ruin it?

I have nothing more to add

2009-01-13T14:49:00.008-05:00

Thanks to Christian for finding this at Fuck You, Penguin (this is so much easier than trying to be creative myself):

Monkey Overkill

Monkey, I've got something to say, and it's about you biting that bar, and it's not going to be pretty.

You know, Monkey, if you had just sat there, like a normal monkey, you would have been cute enough. Hell, you could have even fallen on your back and put all of your arms and legs up in the air, and I would have been fine with it. But biting that bar? Fuck you. Just. Fuck. You.

So yeah, fuck you Spider Monkey...you're going down tonight. At 11pm at BMO.

The choice is easy...play ultimate

2008-12-23T15:16:00.004-05:00

Due to the lack of Hound availability, tonight's game will be sponsored by Subway...

...even though I have provided all of the subs. Heyo!

For those missing the game, you will also miss out on the return of Lyanne from ~~sleeplessness~~ motherhood. But have fun at your Christmas parties/parent's house/trip to the Philippines/snuff film viewing.

Ready, Set, Dodgeball!

2008-12-14T22:57:00.006-05:00

This Tuesday we have a rematch against Tony & Carmel, who we lost to in the season opener 27-19. We'll definitely need to bring our A game.

Some people might think that the name is a reference from The Sopranos, but it's actually

HOLY CRAP DUDE LOOK OUT FOR THOSE SHOES!!!

Like Fred Flintstone driving around with bald feet

2008-12-09T14:00:00.005-05:00

Tonight's game against RUMP should be a good one. Before we started the season, it appeared that they were one of the top 4 teams, so we'll have to be ready for them. And there's no way that I will accept losing to a cut of meat (unless it's a Flat Iron).

The Beastie Boys have also made a song about our game tonight. I was talking to Adam Yauch the other day, and he told me that when they wrote "Shake Your Rump" they actually wanted to say "Kick Rump's Ass." It just didn't fit the rhyming scheme of the song.

I guess we'll just have to abide by the spirit of their original intentions.

Winners can do what they want

2008-12-02T14:04:00.006-05:00

This is how the Spider Monkey reacted when it learned that it is playing against the Hounds tonight:

We must be careful though, because Spider Monkeys do have a vicious side. Especially when they are embodied by a 7 year-old ginger kid:

Two letters to the Hounds

2008-11-26T22:53:00.006-05:00

Dear First Half Hounds,

Great work. We were running with a quality team, and were right there trading points with them. We were working the disc around, running hard and connecting on our strikes. We played tough defense, making them work, covering the deep and causing turnovers. There was a lot to like about the way we played.

Regards,

Dear Second Half Hounds,

Boo.

Sincerely,

This is not a button

2008-11-25T10:23:00.008-05:00

Ceci n'est pas un bouton

Tonight we are playing "It's not a button" at 10:00 on Field A. This is another one of Kev's teams (although I don't think Kev is on this one), so they will be a solid opponent. Here's hoping that Kev stacked his Tony & Carmel team, so this one won't be as good.

Strategy-wise, we will have to keep in mind that the field is much thinner, so there is less space to work with. Keeping the disc moving, and making solid, smart passes will be very important, because it's going to be more crowded that a Tokyo subway at rush hour.

I had previously asked The White Stripes for some help scouting this team, but unfortunately after years of loud music and drugs, I think Jack White didn't hear me correctly. Although if this team was a button, I'm sure it would be the hardest button to button.

Pre-game Rock Bandage

Don't forget to come early to my place for some Rock Band. I'll have some snacks and beverages there, but probably not enough for a complete dinner.

I can't wait to hear Simon sing Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld!

Giving the people what they want

2008-11-21T13:39:00.007-05:00

So I do one serious ultimate post and get a complaint:

You've changed man. Your posts used to be a quick reference to the Simpsons, maybe a clip from Family Guy or a weird 90s band that nobody remembers. Now you're all serious about strategy and stuff.

And I'm still the only one who reads this. Cater to your audience!

When you say that, it makes me have a Sadgasm...

A refresher on Speedpoint

2008-11-18T11:52:00.005-05:00

I played my first indoor game of the season last night, right after playing my final outdoor game of the season. Thank Jeebus indoor is starting, because it was colder than Hell in a Capital One commercial. Seriously, I haven't worn that many layers to play Ultimate since Snowplate. Come to think of it, it might have actually been warmer at Snowplate!

So, some important rule differences to note about Speedpoint:

Stall Count is 8, not 10.
If the disc hits an object that is out of bounds, it's a turnover at the spot where it went out of bounds, not where it hit the object.
When there is a score, or when there is a turnover in the endzone in the endzone, the disc is put into play from that spot. It is not walked up to the goalline.
If the disc lands or rolls out of the endzone, then the play is restarted on the goalline

Aside from rules, there is the change in strategy from outdoor to indoor. After a crap-load of ultimate this summer, it was very strange to play indoor. No wind means that swilly throws are always in play, and of course everyone starts to pull out the hammer.

There is also the change in field size. While Field B is wider than CC Sabathia, Fields A and C are much narrower, so it will be important to maintain a solid structure when making cuts. On offense we'll be running a 3-3 Horizontal.

As we have learned from experience, there are some keys to success in the indoor game. Cuts should be timed well to maximize openness without cutting others off. As well, cutters should try to keep into their lanes. Also, since it's speedpoint, everyone should always be running hard and subbing quickly. If you're not running...sub off!

As we'll be running a Ho, it is imperative that we get the disc off of the sideline. If we have the disc within 10 feet of the forced sideline (unless there is an open upfield pass right away), we should be looking to swing the disc to get it off the line. This will open up the field, get more cutters involved with the play, allow the Ho stack to fluorish, and minimize any dangers of hitting the mesh/lights.

Finally, we should try to keep the disc moving as much as possible. Lots of passes keeps the defense on their heels. Obviously, we'll pull out the long bombs (especially with Frogger on the team), but we should try to play an up-tempo style, which I think suits our speed and overall team hustle.

Tonight we begin play with Tony and Carmel, one of the strongest teams in the league. Let's work hard and start off the season with a big upset victory!

No Birds Allowed?

2008-10-24T15:40:00.005-04:00

I was catching up at Idea Drunk, and saw a great post from a couple of weeks ago (not many words, lots of pictures...my kind of reading).

There are a couple cool pictures, including one that looks like a girl coming out of a Stargate. But there is one picture that I'm calling shenanigans on:

There is no way this is a real sign. Not possible. I don't believe it for a second. Why not? Have you ever seen a "No birds allowed" sign before? No. You know why? Because they don't exist!

For one, look at the sign. If you notice, it is exactly the same shape as the seagull, including the part at the tail that has the feathers sticking up, which isn't always the case. Also, look at the legs: if you were going to make this sign, are you really going to go through the trouble of making sure the bird's knees (or whatever they are) are detailed like that?

Even if you think a sign like that is real, in which situation would it be used? Is someone bringing their pet birds to this part of town? "Damn, I was hoping to bring Squawkie down to the beach today for some fun and swimming, but look at the sign. Shit. I guess we have to go back to our weekly visits to the dump." I don't think so. I know there are some weird pets out there, but come on, a seagull?

Well, if it's not directed at humans, then it can only be there as a notice for birds. But if that is the case then...um...what? They're birds. They can't read. Or understand signs. If they could, wouldn't this sign be all over Trafalgar Square?

I can just picture it...

Bird 1 - "Hey Celeste, what are you up to?"
Bird 2 - "Not much Withrow...I'm hungry, so I was thinking of heading to the beach and stealing someone's hot dog while they weren't looking."
Withrow - "That sounds like fun. Mind if I come? The crazy bread lady didn't show up at the park this morning, so I'm hungry too."
Celeste - "Sure, no problem...let's go."

- Celeste and Withrow arrive at the beach.

Withrow - "Hey, look at that kid, he's totally going to drop his sandwich. Ready to go in?"
Celeste - "Whoa, wait a minute Withrow, look at that sign. It says that we aren't allowed here."
Withrow - "What the...? Really? Oh come on. I've been coming here for years! THIS IS BULLSHIT!!"
Celeste - "Hey man, don't blame me, I'm just a bird who can comprehend what that sign says somehow."
Withrow - "Goddammit. First they kick us out of the subway stations, now this. This fucking city makes me sick. You know how much more garbage there would be on the streets if it wasn't for us? I am so going to write a letter to the editor about this."
Celeste - "I hear ya. Want to go poop on Dave Winfield's car instead?"
Withrow - "Oh, you always know how to cheer me up...I fucking hate that asshole."
Celeste - "Let's book."

My Electoral Paradox

2008-10-14T12:33:00.004-04:00

With today being the Federal Election, obviously I have to go cast my vote after work. However, my choice is not as simple as voting for the candidate who I think would be best to lead Canada.

Because of our system of government, the choice in my riding comes down to voting between the NDP and Liberal candidates. The Conservative candidate has always been a lost cause in this riding...I don't even know who it is this year (not like I'd vote for them anyway). As for Green...ask me again in 10 years when they might actually be viable as a party.

And this is where my Electoral Paradox comes in. My preference is to vote for Olivia Chow, the NDP candidate. But, if I do that, I am voting against a Liberal, Christine Innes, with a good chance of winning, thus (theoretically) weakening the Liberals' numbers. So for me, a vote for the NDP is a vote for the Conservatives and sweater boy. And I can't be a part of that.

[Of course, if I vote for Innes, then I'm voting for the Liberals...and Stephane Dion. Ugh. He exites me about as much as the propects of getting a colonoscopy.]

So that's my conundrum, which is probably similar to what everyone else is facing today (well...the 65% of us, that is).

It probably doesn't really matter though. We all know that the zombies will be coming for us shortly...

It's on

2008-10-05T13:27:00.005-04:00

Dear person who I beat in the Fantasy Hockey Pool last year,

I think you are mistaken about the tiebreakers....I didn't have Sidney Crosby on my team last year (zing!).

You're going down harder than Big Fish after one of my motivational speeches.

Sincerely,

The two-time champion of the Springfield Shinny League.

Who knew that Homer Simpson was coaching Sarah Palin?

2008-10-03T13:42:00.007-04:00

Normally I'm not one to comment on politics, but as I was flipping through the channels on my way to watching more important things (i.e. the baseball playoffs) I stopped by the American Vice-Presidential Debate.

And that's when I discovered that perhaps Sarah Palin and I have something in common: watching the Simpsons and Family Guy.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Officer: Next weekend, we're having our annual war games. Now Simpson, because of your many years as a nuclear technician, we're putting you on a nuclear sub.
Homer: "Nuc-u-lar". It's pronounced "nuc-u-lar".
Officer: Oh, whatever.
Homer: "Nuc-u-lar".

And now here is someone who could potentially be President of United States of America:

I'm super serial

2008-09-18T22:21:00.008-04:00

It's been almost two weeks since the Hounds went home disappointed from the Monday Playoffs, and I've been spending all that time trying to figure out what went wrong. Seriously, I haven't gone to work, played Rock Band, or even made sandwiches since that fateful Saturday in my quest to understand what the hell went wrong.

Well, after reviewing the game tapes, interviewing numerous witnesses, consulting Psychic Nikki and howling at the moon for 5 nights in a row, I believe I have found the reason why we lost.

Now, some may say that the short roster did us in. Or that we were missing some key players. Perhaps people have told you that we just didn't have "it" that day while Disc Horde just played better than us.

Those people are stupid.

The answer is so obvious that I can't believe no one figured it out at the time. The reason why we lost is due to the most diabolically evil creature on the earth. It is the single greatest threat to our planet. I'm talking of course, about...

MANBEARPIG

Consequences of switching nights

2008-09-03T20:59:00.005-04:00

As the TUC Playoffs approach, I'm sure everyone is getting mentally prepared for Saturday. Me, I'm watching the final scene of The Karate Kid over and over. (One thing I don't understand from that movie is how a punch to the face is illegal, but a kick to the face is perfectly fine. It makes about as much sense as the popularity of that awful band Hedley.)

But, let's look ahead to next summer for a quick moment.

There has been talk of moving to Wednesday next year, which I think is a great idea. Right off the top of my head, I can think of a few reasons why we should:

- better competition

- no long weekend games

- time to recover from the weekend

But it's never that easy, as there would be repercussions if we moved days. There would be some roster issues as some people are already on a team on Wednesday (stupid Berzurk!). Plus, would the changing of the night that the Hounds get down to business affect Business Time?

Just something that you probably hadn't considered.

A much better All-Star Game than the Pro Bowl

2008-08-28T22:53:00.006-04:00

In the morning of Saturday, September 14th, TUC is hosting the Scally's Cup All-Star Challenge at BMO Field. Hopefully this All-Star game will be better than the major pro sports' games (because it's entirely realistic to compare a local flatball league to professional sports...).

Here are my current rankings:

4) Football - For football players, the Pro Bowl is a bonus cheque and a free trip to Hawaii for the family. If not for those two things, no one would ever go, and it shows in the game.

3) Basketball - Even with the Slam Dunk Contest enjoying a bit of a creative renaissance, the game itself is horr-awful (to borrow Shaq's phrase). It's basically a showcase for hoisting up 3's, loads of turnovers, and practicing alley-oops while the defense watches (or moves out of the way).

2) Hockey - A lot of what makes hockey exciting (the speed, intensity and body-checking) is lost in this glorified game of shinny. At least the goalies are trying to keep the score respectable, even if that is like Big Fish trying to cover Joel, Tien, Bonnie or Christian in the endzone; scoring is inevitable. But at least the NHL ASG gave us Owen Nolan vs Dominik Hasek:

1) Baseball - How sad is it that the best All-Star Game is the one that felt the need to justify itself as "counting" for home-field advantage in the World Series? But at least the players actually do try, whereas in the other leagues they are just going through the motions. But MLB, don't push some contrived notion to make the game seem more important than it really is.

So, the Scally's Cup doesn't have to give us much to be the best All-Star Game around. I just hope it's taken seriously, unlike the one at Gender Blender. The GB game is definitely a different monster though, so I have high hopes it won't be like that.

Players will be chosen based on nominations. Hopefully our 10-2-1 record will translate into a couple of players selected. But we need to do our part, and should suggest some worthy candidates. Some people who I was thinking of are:

Yoink - Adrian, Ryan, Sarah

4D - Chee, Matt

Disc Horde - Shimmy, Dan, Maria

5E - I think his name is Sachin

Ventura Wu - Sue

Mandrew - sorry, you need to show up to more than 1 out of 3 games

Any thoughts on who we should/should not nominate?

My admittedly garbage Nationals preview

2008-08-11T21:02:00.016-04:00

As we all know, CUC 2008 is taking place this week. As is becoming a tradition, the Hounds will be well-represented: Carla and Connie will be playing with Lotus; Bonnie, Nat, Sarah and Frogger will be kicking ass with Tundra, Lyanne will be trying to lead Big Hammers to an improvement on their 7th place finish last year...and Tien will be working on his anger management with Roy.

Play well, have fun, and bring back some shiny medals!

Now, as much as I like to act like I know everything, I actually don't. Please, don't be so shocked...it's true. So, with the bar being set really low, here are my somewhat-but-not-really-informed Nationals Predictions:

Mixed

Does anyone else think that Ontario got a bit of the shaft with these seedings? I mean, I know that most teams stunk up the joint at Mixed Up, but the top seed is Monster with the 8th seed. Really? Last year there were 4 teams from Ontario in the top 8, so this year if seeds hold there will be one. I disagree. Although that's because I am going to totally crap over the Alberta and Prairie teams (who I know nothing about).

Pool A looks pretty simple with TFP and Monster likely to finish 1-2, unless TFP loses its focus after winning the Worlds. Swarm will finish third, which could be the highlight of their tournament. Don't worry about Wannabego.

Pool B is where Tundra is, and they have a tough road ahead of them as the 15th seed. They have championship contenders Gecko as the top seed, Saskquatch (I wonder where they are from?) and the always solid Mayhem. Gecko takes the pool easily, and I'm calling Mayhem and Tundra to take down the farmers. I think Tundra will really have to come out firing and utilize their women and height against Mayhem. If they can stop Mayhem's flow, they can take second in the pool, which would be great considering not much will be expected of them coming in.

Pool C looks like the Group of Death, with Psychoplastique (AB #1), RIP, Clearcut (BC #2) and Big Hammers all with legitimate claims to the top seed. Anyone in this pool could finish first or last, so I'm going to say it ends up being RIP, Big Hammers, Clearcut and Psychoplastique, in that order. I don't expect anyone to escape this pool with a 3-0 record.

Pool D is Onyx's for the taking, and 2nd likely comes down to who wins the Liquid/Bronco game in the morning. I don't see good things in BFC's future...I think they are a solid team, but I think others will rise above them. Although they could surprise and nab the 3rd spot on their experience from last year (yeah, I'm hedging a bit).

Quarterfinals - I'm going to go with TFP, Monster, Onyx, Liquid, Gecko, RIP, Big Hammers and Clearcut as the final 8, with TFP and Gecko meeting in the finals. That's right, I'm really going out on a limb to predict the top two seeds make the finals!!

I think Tundra will finish around 10th (although I'm really hoping for top 8), and if they do better, it's because Bonnie got mad at someone and took over.

[As an aside:

Dear Ontario teams,

Please do well and place as many teams in the top 8 as possible.

Sincerely,

Given the number of touring teams in the province (especially compared to every other region) we need as many bids as possible for Nats. If Snipe beat Gecko last year on Day 2, Ontario gets another bid and Zen makes it to Nationals. Just sayin'...]

Women's

Unlike Mixed where a case could be made for half the teams to win the whole enchilada, Women's looks like it doesn't quite have that same depth. I see Stella, Storm and Lotus (as long as they take Bushfire seriously) taking their respective pools, leading to an all-Ontario final that will be the closest final of the day. If I have to make a choice, I'll say that Stella takes it on universe point over Lotus. PPF and Bushfire are my darkhorse picks.

Open

Last year Invictus finished third behind Furious and Goat (they almost beat Goat on Day 2). So, not seeing either of those two teams playing this week, plus the fact that Invictus will be playing at home, I'm calling them to win it over Nomads from BC. Phoenix might surprise and make the finals. Then again, they might not.

I don't envision anyone seeded 9th and lower moving into the top 8. If Roy beats it's 12 seed, that means they had a good tournament.

Juniors

I have no clue, so I'm just going to say that the BC kids beat the Toronto kids again this year.

Masters

All I know about Masters is that when your team is seeded 3rd, and your leaders see me in a bar 3 days before the tournament begins and ask if I'm old enough to play, then your team is probably in trouble. So, don't expect much from Fossil this week.

It doesn't really matter, GLUM will win, probably over Figjam.

-------------------------------------------------

So, there you have my predictions. I'm curious to see how close I end up . Although, with no posts up yet on the esteemed sites (Cultimate, Canadian Ultimate) or even the non-esteemed ones (cough *Big Fish guy's blog* cough) these could be the definitive prognostications for CUC 2008.

Does that make my guesses sound more valid? No? Oh well...that's what I figured.

Good luck Hounds!

To whom it may concern

2008-08-11T10:08:00.003-04:00

Dear Mandrew,

Boo.

Sincerely,
Release the Hounds

Slip Sliding Away

2008-07-28T12:49:00.004-04:00

After a fun weekend, we get back to business tonight as we take on 4D for the second time this season. Last time they got 10 points...let's make sure they get less this time.

The game is at Caledonia Park, at Lawrence and Caledonia (on top of the hill). Be there by 6:30pm.

And now for my new segment, CHEERS AND JEERS:

CHEERS

To Joel and Steph for hosting the weekend.

JEERS

To Nat, for not coming.

CHEERS

To the awesome Slip & Slide (or "large sheet of plastic facing down a hill", since it wasn't an actual Slip & Slide).

JEERS

To the hole at the bottom of the aforementioned Slip & Slide, which wrenched my flickin' thumb backwards. It's pretty sore, but I should still be able to play. Just no thumb-wrestling for me for awhile.

New Jersey wasn't as good as Slippery When Wet

2008-07-21T10:07:00.005-04:00

Tonight we're playing against Disc Horde, a team that we beat earlier this season 17-10. We'll be at the new Field Turf fields at Downsview Park, so they won't be as affected by all the rain we've been having.

In more important news, we are hoping to get our new jerseys tonight. I have seen the design, so I'll give a little inspiration without ruining anything:

As long as it's ready for me to pick up from VC today, I'm definitely looking forward to getting the new jersey tonight . Much moreso than this New Jersey:

Not that the album is that bad, it just wasn't Slippery When Wet, which was a monster (Livin' on a Prayer AND Wanted Dead or Alive). Of course, the New Jersey album does have a song that definitely does NOT apply to Simon this Summer.

Hounds on the Beach?

2008-07-17T22:34:00.005-04:00

I'm sure most of you have had enough of me telling stories about my trip to the Philippines, when I stumbled upon the Boracay Dragons ultimate team and was able to join in their scrimmages. Well, it's time for the Hounds to storm the beach, and I'm not referring to sandbagging teams playing the mini 5's league.

If you ever check out the BULA blog in my Blogroll (it's on computers now), you would have seen this recent story about the Boracay Dragons winning a tournament last month. They have become THE team to beat on the beach. Here is the video covering their most recent victory (including a scary meeting of the minds):

I propose that we attempt to slay the dragons and take a Hounds team to the Philippines to play in the Boracay Open. That's right...a Hounds Balikbayan team.

I have touched base with my friend Junthir in Boracay about the possibility of bringing a team over, and he's very excited to help us out. He's not sure when exactly the tournament will take place, as in the past it's been March or May. I suggested March would be better for us, so it won't affect those with touring aspirations, or the start of the TUC season. I think he'll do his best to ensure that happens.

I'm guessing the cost would be in the $2500-$3000 range, with the biggest cost of course being airfare. Junthir can probably help us get a good deal on a hotel (or find places for us to stay), and food and drink is ridiculously cheap compared to Canada. When I was there, 1 beer cost about 40 cents. Seriously. I've got $5...let's go get drunk.

So...who's interested? We can see who's in from the Hounds, and then find others. It's a 4-on-4 tournament, so we'd only need about 10 players.

This could be a part of a larger vacation for people (i.e. visiting relatives in a neighbouring country), so it doesn't have to be all about Boracay, although there's definitely nothing wrong with that.

Either way, I'd love to do more of this next year:

Alligator Lizards in the air

2008-07-13T14:39:00.015-04:00

The most important game of our lives is this Monday as we play Ventura Wu at 6:30pm at Vaughan Road Academy (not at Sunnybrook).

Why is it the most important game? Shut up, that's why.

Simon has guaranteed* that he will be coming to the game, so we have that to look forward to. We should also plan on hitting up Scallywags afterward since we're sort of in the neighbourhood (plus it's half-priced food).

This game kinda reminds me of a song by America...

Did you know that in this song the "Alligator Lizards" America is referring to are actually flatballs? It's a little known fact that America was into the ultimate scene, and one day while throwing the disc around, Dan Peek was trash-talking Dewey Bunnell's throwing into the wind: "You're throwing worse than an alligator, or a lizard...yeah, you suck worse than an Alligator Lizard."

Even though it didn't make any sense, somehow it stuck in their group, and they then referred to any swilly throws as "Alligator Lizards". When they wrote "Ventura Highway" later that year, that term fit in the song much better than "Frisbees".

*not a guarantee

Update from Simon:

"Folks,
Just had a babysitter drop out, so won't be able to join you until Olympia's home...but being within 5 mins of Scallywags and our first chance to use half price food, I'll be pushing for some post-game eating whatever happens!"

This is why I put the asterisk for Simon's guarantee. He's dangerously close to getting the Christian treatment on the blog.

I just wanna go to the rooftops and scream: Hounds beat Mandrew!!!!

2008-07-09T23:28:00.012-04:00

Remember at the end of "The Karate Kid" when Daniel fought Johnny for the All-Valley Under-18 Karate Championships? After getting beat up for months, he finally defeated his nemesis and earned his respect at the same time. It was amazing! Who else wasn't cheering on Daniel when he went into the "Crane" stance? I mean who else besides Christian, who was 1 when this movie was released...

Ok, so that's about the opposite of how we reacted on Monday.

After two really, really bad losses last year, (and after two false starts this year), this past Monday the Hounds played, and finally beat, the venerable Monday team Mandrew. Even though 8 players had been busting their asses at Regionals, we managed to bring enough energy (and subs) to turn a 9-8 deficit at half in to a 17-12 victory.

Was it me, or were we as excited for that win as we were when we beat MOB in the winter? Seriously...this team kicked our asses last year...twice! Let's how some enthusiasm!

We will definitely have to watch out for them later as they are quite pissed off now. Plus, they were missing some of their key players.

Best comment at the lunch table at work on Tuesday

Me, to Rol: "Don' worry. Half of your team was tired from playing Regionals this weekend. Oh wait...that was us."

Perhaps that didn't help the whole "pissed off" thing. But c'mon, it was funny...

Bonnie can now retire (not really)

Where else can you go after hand-blocking an Olympic Gold medalist twice?

Then and now

Do you remember the time last year when Mandrew zoned us and we kept screwing up? Do you remember the time on Monday when they tried to zone us and we ripped through it faster than a 6-year-old tears through his Christmas presents? Do you remember the time when Michael Jackson released the "Remember the Time" video and it was showed on Fox? What a self-indulgent piece of garbage that was. Ooh, you kissed Iman and turned into sand...good for you...

From the makers of "Where's Waldo?"

Where's Simon?

[Hint: not at Eglinton Flats]

Canada Day excitement

2008-06-29T18:58:00.009-04:00

Sometimes, I love where I live.

One of the best parts about my location is that every May 24 and Canada Day I have a great view of the fireworks at Ontario Place (not to mention all the Joe Schmo fireworks throughout the city).

It's like my own personal Feist video...except for the cute little Indie singer (apparently that's going to be a part of Phase 3).

The worst part about where I live: zombie attacks.

In actual RTH news

Since Ventura Wu would prefer to lounge around and relax at the cottage instead of getting their butts whooped by us, we (and when I say "we", I mean "I") had to find another opponent for Monday.

Luckily, Yoink is going to be around and also was without someone to play. So, like eharmony, TUC used their two dimensions of compatibility (plays on Mondays; needs an opponent) to match us up.

More importantly, Pierre will be coming out to relive his Hounds (and maybe Beach) glory days. Hopefully he has his cleats, because we could use a few more ill-advised hammers in our game.

Irish Car Bombs to follow. Hopefully you have the day off on Tuesday.

Release the Hounds vs Yoink - 6:30pm, Eglinton Flats Rugby 9.

Toronto is about to get a lot more awesome

2008-06-25T00:55:00.007-04:00

That's right...Pierre is coming for a visit. As mentioned a few weeks ago, he is going to be in town from Wednesday to Tuesday. Anyone know any more details than that?

Hopefully he can make it out to the game on Monday and watch (perhaps play?) us destroy Ventura Wu. Of course, this has to be followed by wings, ribs, beer and Irish Car Bombs after the game.

We're never going to play Mandrew are we?

2008-06-25T00:28:00.008-04:00

There must be some cosmic force at work that doesn't want us to play Mandrew. A big storm on Monday afternoon forced TUC called off games. That's two games against Mandrew that haven't happened yet. One day we'll play them...one day.

Of course, since 9 Hounds were playing at Northern Flights, we were about as disappointed with this ruling as Tien is when a plate full of wings is placed in front of him. So, we were kind of like Garbage, if only for one day.

I'm itchy

2008-06-23T13:15:00.005-04:00

Game tonight: 6:30 at Eglinton Flats Rugby #9

We're playing against the best competition on Mondays; Mandrew.

I can't really think of much more to say about our game tonight, because I'm too distracted from scratching all of my bug bites from playing in North Bay this weekend.

Apparently tears are not enough.

Also, yours truly made the North Bay Nugget. Had they asked me the same questions on Sunday, I would have had a much different response. So many things were missing (like, the TD and the schedules at the start of the day), it was like they forgot it was a 2-day tournament.

Will we see the Hounds Hard Hat?

2008-06-16T14:30:00.006-04:00

Release the Hounds is playing against 4D tonight at 7pm at BMO 2 (East side).

We played them last year (and won...take that, bitches!). While most of us are tired from Experiencing Summer, 4D was also playing at Sunnybrook this weekend, so hopefully they will be equally tired.

Afterwards, rumour has it we might be going out for a post-game meal. But I don't like to start rumours*, so you didn't hear that from me.

Thanks to the democratic process, one of the Wongs has been chosen to pick up the hard hat. While they did actually tie in the vote with Pierre, apparently Pierre is too lazy to fly over from France to pick that up for us. What a jerkstore.

* Christian wets his bed.

Exhaustion setting in

2008-06-09T13:59:00.006-04:00

Get it? It's a Hound, and he's tired!

Oh Gender Blender. You were so much fun; at least the parts that I can remember. But now I'm stuck at my desk, and I can feel my legs tightening and my liver rebelling with every email that arrives in my Inbox.

[Turn your sarcasm detectors on]

So, there's nothing I'd rather do tonight than play my 8th game in 3 days.

"My God, this baby is off the charts!"

See you tonight at 7:00 at BMO. We play Disc Horde. We beat them twice last year. They haven't lost yet this year. Let's change that. Why are my sentances so short?

The Superfreak from the Goonies previews tonight's game

2008-06-02T13:47:00.008-04:00

Thank you Sloth, for that insightful and thorough commentary on tonight's matchup.

Release the Hounds vs Superfreaks
Sunnybrook East Cricket, 6:30pm.

Anyone up for going to watch the Wings clinch the Stanley Cup afterwards?

What did you call us?

2008-05-25T21:48:00.007-04:00

Did you hear that? Ventura just called us losers. Are we gonna take that?

Release the Hounds vs Ventura Wu; 6:30, Earl Haig SS

Be there at 6:30 (6:15 if you haven't thrown outside since August).

By the way, notable Earl Haig alumni include Tennis player Daniel Nestor and actors Neve Campbell, Paul Gross, Sarah Polley and Degrassi's Snake, Stefan Brogren.

I figured that was information that you just had to know for the game.

As called

2008-05-18T01:58:00.012-04:00

When the Hounds last played on real grass, we finished last summer's regular season with a tie against the 7th-best-team-in-the-country (and eventual Monday champs) Big Hammers. This capped 9-4-2 season which saw us rise from 14th to 4th in the Monday Ladder.

Of course, since then we won the Monday Winter Competitive Indoor League...not too shabby.

This year it looks like we're going into the season amongst the top-ranked teams (are the seedings accurate, or are the 1-5 teams random? If so, we're 2nd to Mandrew.). I guess this means we're not that "young, up-and-coming team" anymore...

This year TUC is separating the Comp from the Int/Rec teams, so we have 13 other teams in our division. Here is what my in-depth research has turned up:

Mandrew - After winning the whole enchilada the past few years, they lost to Big Hammers in the finals last year. They are the team to beat, but they are also a year older from last year. If they were dogs, that might mean more since 1 human year is like 7 dog years. Of course, we're also a year older than last year, so I guess that doesn't really mean anything. They beat us twice last year, so let's try to do better, ok?

Ninjastars_Mon - We played them last year and didn't do too well. Tough team to call this year; it'll depend which of their Monsters (if any) come out from week to week.

Disc Horde - We also played them twice last year (and won, woo-hoo!), but they look like they've picked up some pretty good players, so we'll have to watch out for them.

Ventura Wu - This is all I can think of when I see the name "Ventura"...

Let's (figuratively) beat them like that...

kookaburras - Someone was once impressed because I knew that a Kookaburra is an

Australian bird. The only reason I knew was because I played cricket in high school and Kookaburra is a cricket equipment company with a bird as their logo.

By the way, tea time is very under-appreciated in sports. We should definitely bring it in to the ultimate scene. Screw spirit games...I want tea time...

El Kabong - Another team we played last year who appears to have picked up some new players. Luckily guitars are not accepted on the ultimate field.

D.I.R.T. - A true up-and-coming team; Toronto's Juniors squad. Sure, they may be young, fast, fit, athletic, have a coach...um...but at least we can go out for beers afterwards before having to go home to families/jobs/responsibilities. Yeah, take that, DIRT; we know you're jealous of us.

4D - The last of the teams that we played last summer, and another team that will likely be better than last year.

B.O.M. (Barrel of Monkeys) - According to Wikipedia: "One monkey arouses a great deal of amusement. Two or more then double the interest and amusement. If one were to release a barrel full of monkeys, we must suppose that their antics would become hilariously comical."

Let's be sure to kick their hilariously comical asses.

As an aside, if I were a monkey and stuck in a barrel with a bunch of other poop-flingers, hilariously comical is probably not the best term to describe how I would feel about my situation.

Superfreaks - I don't know anything about this team, but the name reminds me of the time my family drove across the country so my sister could take part in some sort of kiddie-beauty pageant. It was quite the experience and even though she didn't win, but she tried her best and afterwards my family was closer than ever. Luckily there were some cameras there to capture the moment:

Flick Fu - The best comment from Zen tryouts belongs to Andrew H, who recalled when we killed Flick Fu in the Winter 2007 league that we played at Varsity: "The Hounds totally should become a touring team." What do you think, Simon?

Anyway, I don't know if we could use the Hounds name to tour...we might have to come up with another name. Let me check my hair dryer to see if I can think of one...

5E - Are these guys making fun of 4D? If so, that's awesome. If not, meh...

Oxygen Hazard - Is this team made up of the martians

from Mars Attacks? Is that why Oxygen is a hazard? If that's the case, then I'm more concerned about their ray guns than anything they can actually do on the field. Did you see those things? If you get shot, you get disintegrated immediately. That would totally suck.

Alright, so that's everyone that we could be playing this summer. I figure the teams that we'll really have to look out for are Mandrew, Disc Horde and Ninjastars. Of course, we'll see how things play out when the games begin.

Also of note is the pending return of Pierre in late June. Let's be sure to be at the top of the ladder when he returns.

A few questions going into the season:

1) What's going on with the Mandrew game? Are we taking the default, or going to reschedule?

2) Are we getting uniforms? For VC shirts, I'm a Men's Small. Just sayin'...

3) For those who are touring; will we let tournaments tire us out for Hounds games? Let's all agree not to let that happen, okay? Okay.

One more week

2008-05-15T23:33:00.006-04:00

The best part is, I don't even have to procrastinate since we aren't playing Monday. You know, since Mandrew can't field a team on Monday even though TUC has been starting the season on the long weekend for years.

Hopefully this weekend I'll come up with some sort of funny season preview. Or what most of you will call it: a season preview.

And because it's been far too long since I should have posted this song suggestion from Dan; ladies and gentlemen: the Mooney Suzukis, who have obviously heard of us...

Lookin' for some shelter
Lookin' for some peace
The fire in the furnace
Been burnin' like the beast
My pants have all been pressed
All my collars neatly creased
My ride bummin' thumb is up
Cause now the hounds have been released

Release the Hounds!

I'll be back

2008-04-13T23:46:00.006-04:00

Since the Hounds won't be playing for another month, there will likely be a lull here. Sorry, but I'm not sure if I have the time to post while I'm trying to achieve enlightenment.

Of course, there are always Bonnie's, Christian's and Hamid's sites to visit, plus here are some old favourite posts of mine.

That's right, it's a cheesy clip show, but in blog form:

As Bonners called it, the Hounds Book of Genesis

Steve Sullivan and karma

Hounds closed due to falling ice (Austin also gets inspired from American Beauty)

I still think this commercial sucks

The OK Go video

I love this song. Thank you Tien for giving me an excuse to post it.

Pierre's final game; I get cheesy

End of Season party, with Paper Plate Awards

In case I don't post right away when the Summer season starts in May

Christian's Bud Light parody...perhaps that was why he didn't get traded

That kick-ass Hounds on Ice song, which was key to our Snowplate victory

I complain about my height mojo

The Hounds win Winter, but unfortunately the commenters remind us of karaoke

Next Hounds game: Monday, May 19th. Don't forget, it's a holiday Monday.

Sweep!

2008-04-08T00:00:00.010-04:00

At BMO

Obviously the big news is that Release the Hounds won the Monday Competitive Championship on Friday with a convincing 7-point victory over the Disciples of Love. Thus completed the most dominating title run since whenever the last Women's hockey tournament that Canada played in. Taking away the 6-0 default win, we won our games by an average of 19 points. But I think more impressive was limited our opponents to an average of 12 points per game.

As someone noted, it's like we were the Patriots, except that we actually won all of our games.

At the ~~SkyDome~~ Rogers Centre

Friday night was a busy night, as Christian and I attended the Blue Jays home opener against the Red Sox. Shaun Marcum was on fire as he struck out 8 over 7 innings. Unfortunately, we had to leave after the seventh inning, but at least we were able to see the Jays, rocking their kick-ass powder blue uniforms take the lead (which they would not relinquish). Of course, after we left there was a fight in the stands a few sections away from our seats, plus a couple of quasi-streakers before the final out. Also, I didn't get drunk.

You're welcome.

The Blue Jays had strong pitching all weekend, and Frank Thomas drove in 8 runs as they swept the Red Sox. It's still early, but it's nice to see such a strong showing right out of the gate.

For better Blue Jays analysis, there are quite a few sites out there, and I have found these two to be excellent ones:

1) The Mockingbird - This is written by a friend of mine, although I think it is just his excuse for constantly using pitch f/x. It's a site that analyzes things like batting slumps and success, pitcher's great or Towers-esque starts, and bad umpiring. All while mixing in a healthy dose of sarcasm.

2) Drunk Jays Fans - This could be the most appropriately named site since Hot Chicks with Douchebags. Considering they usually are drunk when they post, they know their shit, and are fucking hilarious. I have to swear when describing it because...well, just check it out.

TUC BBS threads that I did not write

I found this one to be amusing. All I can say is this: aren't we all, Leroy...aren't we all...

Read the labels!

2008-04-02T17:45:00.004-04:00

So, apparently some of you forgot what day it was yesterday when reading my post. You also didn't read the label below the post. It's too bad, because I think the labels are just as funny as the rest of my posts...

Anyways, rumours of my desertion of the Hounds have been greatly exaggerated...by me. I'm still planning on winning the Monday Summer league with the Hounds.

So, for those who were fooled by yesterday's post, I have someone here who doesn't want to pity you, but probably will anyway.

A sad announcement

2008-04-01T10:38:00.009-04:00

It is with deep sadness that I write today's post. No, I don't regret the total smackdown we laid on the Ultimate Volleyball Team last night. It's something else.

It looks like this is going to be my last season with the Hounds.

Because of my responsibilities with work, Touring and my new Rock Band obsession, something has to give, and it looks like it's going to be Hounds.

It's been an awesome three years playing with you all. I can't believe it's almost been three years since we played our first game.

I hope we can make my last game a memorable one with a Championship win on Friday over the Disciples of Love.

I'm getting sick of Volleyball

2008-03-31T15:10:00.009-04:00

We're playing the Ultimate Volleyball Team again (10pm, BMO C). The first time we played them, we won 41-11. The second time we played them, they defaulted (so, 6-0 win for us). I expect the score for tonight to be somewhere in between those two.

As for the actual game of volleyball, I don't even like to play it. We all know my issues with height and jumping; so the fact that I have to hit the ball over an 8-foot high net right away depresses me. Add to it the sore arms and jammed fingers that result from bumping, passing and blocking, and this is a sport I am happy not to play.

But after seeing this picture, I may change my mind.

TGIF

2008-03-28T11:32:00.012-04:00

Because that means we have ultimate tonight.

Yes, due to the TUC/BMO confusion, we play tonight against Slam Dunks at 11pm. Nice to see our top ranking got us this illustrious time slot. I'm glad too, because it's not like some of us have to get up at 6:30 tomorrow morning to run a Beach Dodgeball Tournament or anything.

I have no idea who Slam Dunks are, but I'm sure they are nice people who don't deserve the beating they are going to get tonight.

For those of you looking to do something beforehand, Bonners is hosting a ~~carpal tunnel workshop~~ Guitar Hero night at her place.

This is almost where I am at for my music knowledge...other than the 30 minutes listening to the radio in the car on the way to and from work. And even that ends up being pretty much just the Hip, Rush and [insert new Canadian band here].

Guys with more hops than me

2008-03-26T09:45:00.004-04:00

I will be the first to admit that I can't jump very high. Combine this with the fact that I'm short, and, well, let's just say that Dwight Howard doesn't need to worry about me taking his Slam Dunk title away from him.

This is why I secretly hate Joel. Sure, Joel is a great guy and teammate, but not only is he tall enough that he doesn't need to stand on a chair to change a lightbulb, he can also jump through the roof. It is very annoying. That is why I am funding a project to travel back in time to steal his Height Mojo. I hope it works better than that time I tried to equip sharks with frickin' lasers attached to their heads.

But there are others who I might also target. Like Kansas City Royal Joey Gathright (already known for jumping over cars); who decided that the best way to avoid a tag was to jump OVER a pitcher on his way to first base:

Of course, this has already been done on the ultimate field, by Beau Kittridge of Colorado's Mamabird:

I hate you all.

Different kinds of Easter eggs

2008-03-24T10:17:00.004-04:00

Yay! I get to work today! Woohoo!

For those of you who have time (either ot work or at home) here are different kinds of Easter Eggs:

See you tonight when we take on Sasquatch and the Dumpling Gang. Don't forget it's at Varsity.

Hounds > Love

2008-03-19T17:14:00.015-04:00

Monday's game left me with an weird feeling. While it's always nice to win, we didn't seem to play very well. What to make of it all?

Well, we did manage to shut them out for awhile (10-0!), which is quite the accomplishment against this squad. It's not like we were playing those chokers on Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner... Plus, holding the Disciples to only 13 points is a good effort. So cheers to the defense.

Jeers though must go to the offense, which only managed to score 19 times. What is this, regular point?

Something that I noticed was that the stack was set much too far away. This took away any solid deep threats, while giving their D a chance to catch up to us on our in cuts. How many deep throws did we have? With our speed, we should be trying to set that up more. Even if it isn't there, a deep strike sets up solid continuation passes and easy yardage.

We also went through stretches where everyone was trying to do everything, followed by everyone doing nothing. Perhaps the zone threw us off a bit, although I don't know why it should have. It was a passive zone with a two-man cup. Indoors! We should cut through that like Michael Myers cuts through promiscuous teenagers.

So, let's remember to maintain our stack offense, and play our game. And crush the other team.

Anyone else have any thoughts on the game?

Something you might find interesting

At least I did when I saw this thread on the TUC BBS. I don't know who this Richard K guy is, but I like the cut of his jib.

Christian's poetic question

"What's with the random poll on the side? Are we going for dim sum?
If so, I want to come."

Uh, we're playing Sasquatch and the Dumpling Gang on Monday. I'm not very creative.

But, if you wanted, we could go for Dim Sum.
And you could eat it, and it would be yum-yum.
Perhaps wash it down with Coke and rum.
But stinky breath; don't forget to bring gum.
Tittie boobie bum bum

Happy St. Patrick's Day

2008-03-17T12:13:00.005-04:00

It is quite ironic that we are playing the Disciples of Love on the most romantic day of the year (9pm, BMO).

Romantic that is, if your idea of romance is drunkenly hooking up with that special someone who finds multiple shots of Irish Car Bombs and the resulting questionable attempts at Riverdance-ing to "Home for a Rest" adorable.

Otherwise, it's a messy, messy day. And so is the morning after.

Boo-urns to UVT

2008-03-11T16:00:00.000-04:00

No, wait...I was saying "Boo".
Yeah yeah, we're all disappointed that the Ultimate Volleyball Team chose to run and hide rather than face another shellacking. I thought last night would be the night that our +/- would get over 100. It's going to be much tougher to do that next week since we're playing the Disciples of Love.

Although, it did mean that I didn't have to drive all the way to Varsity (as opposed to my 10-minute walk when games are at BMO). Plus, it did allow me to go to bed at a reasonable hour without having to resort to a post-game beer (or six-pack).

In other news:

"Boobie" narrowly beat "Bum bum" and "Tittie" in the poll to determine our funniest word. I was going to use pictures, but I thought I'd keep this site safe for work (sorry pervs!). Use this new information as you see fit.

Another Ultimate Volleyball team

2008-03-09T16:31:00.004-04:00

So, we're playing the Ultimate Volleyball Team again. We played them in the first game of the season, and played pretty well. There was that whole spirit point thing as well where they gave us a 7; the first non-10 we have gotten in a few years. However, I noticed in the standings we're back up to an average of 10...Tyler tells me that TUC reset our spirit score from that game.

Last time I talked about my Super Spike V'Ball prowess (which also made it's way into one of The Roman Empire's recent quizzes), but it's tough to compare that to the Top Gun volleyball scene. Although does anyone really believe that Tom Cruise can spike over that net?

For my own little quiz...what are the call-signs of the 4 players?

My first restaurant review

2008-03-07T21:24:00.008-05:00

Since my neighbourhood is still being built up, there aren't a lot of good places to go to get some good food (although maybe I think I just miss Sneaky Dee's). However, there is an Irish Pub that opened up across the street from my place, called the Brazen Head.

I've been there four times, and to be honest, a part of me just doesn't feel it. The food seems ok on paper, but something just doesn't work. It's not bad, I guess, just a little heavy.

However, they have nailed two things:

1) The Roasted Red Pepper and Artichoke Dip

And they finally figured out the flatbread proportions. The first few times there was a lot of dip left with nothing to scoop it with. It's very annoying when there's dip staring at you and you can't do anything about it.

2) The after-dinner mints

They are these thick Lifesavers mints...spearmint I think...maybe peppermint. Anyways, they are the best mints I have ever had. If they have after-dinner mints in heaven, these are them. Michelle and I always grab as handful extra as we leave. Unless there is a server watching as we leave. Then we each grab one.

Oh, make that three things...they also have Mill St. Organic on tap.

So, Brazen Head: come for the Red Pepper and Artichoke Dip, stay for the mints.

(feel free to use in your testimonials)

Hounds on Ice take Sudbury by storm

2008-03-06T11:30:00.007-05:00

And that was just the drive up.

Yes, the drive up was not fun. For Michelle, Julie and I, it was over 8 hours, which included 45 minutes when traffic was stopped as a tractor-trailer had to be towed out of a ditch. But we eventually got to Jay and Diane's, Lyanne's parents.

At 7:30, I, Bonnie, Dan, Frogger, Jess, Joel, Julie, Lyanne, Lynchy, Matt, Michelle, Nat, Sarah, Steph and Tien got up, and were instantly reminded why Jay and Diane rock, as they served a great breakfast, with so many options. After we powered up, it was off to the driving range and Snowplate.

We went in to the tournament seeded fifth (originally 19th!). The fields were a bit small, so we threw out a zone. I believe our females even volunteered to all play cup (awesome!). We won our first two games handily against the Wingnuts and My Mailman works for the Government (fyi: so does my wife). This allowed us to get used to running in the snow, throwing with gloves on, being cold, singing our song, etc...

Our third game brought up against the PULers (aka Prostitutes, Bucket Fish), the top seed in the tournament (1st and 5th seeds in the same division? Curse you cascade seeding!). We took a commanding lead, working the disc throughout their zone. I believe we were up about 10-4, and then the Peterborough squad switched to man; a switch that worked. We had trouble adjusting our offence and they came back to 10-9. Thank jebus for hard cap.

We finished our fourth game easily against the Frozen Frisbyterians to end the day with the top seed. We were looking forward to naps, Guitar Hero (thanks Bonners!), more food, and of course, the hot tub. Especially those who got some extra aches from the day, like Julie (with a hamstring), me (with a calf) and Lyanne (with a Dan). Spaghetti hit the spot, and the Leafs won, thus further ruining their draft pick. Lots of us tried to stay up for the UFC card; most of us failed. Tittie boobie bum bum.

Sunday morning we were again present with a cornucpia of breakfast (smoothies!). So much food, we were almost late! We packed up, thanked Dan's new Mom and Dad one last time, and zoomed back to the fields. Fungus, our first opponents, apparently haven't learned the cardinal Saturday rule: don't get so drunk that you'll be hungover. Left with only 7 players, they kept it close at the beginning, as well as quoted rules that don't exist (5-2...where in the rules?). We got over it and pushed our way to victory.

In the semi-finals we came up against the Hamilton-Toronto hybrid Frost Cause. We won, and it wasn't very close. We were able to check out the PUL'ers win their semi.

In the finals, we switched up our defensive strategy and played man. The game was quite close, as teams both teams made runs and traded points. We took half 8-7, and came out gunning. We played defence as toight as a tiger and played offence with hard cuts, crisp passes and all around aggressiveness. When all was said and done, we won something like 15-10, and we were Snowplate champs!

Didn't someone say before the first game that we should make sure we have fun, but that we also have a good shot at winning?

Some highlights (please add yours in the comments):

Tien organizing the weekend and leading us to victory.

Our zone.

Lyanne lending us her parents for the weekend.

Dan trying to eliminate Lyanne so he can move in.

Floating chips in the hot tub (no chili though)

Julie the Guitar Hero.

Steph and Michelle keeping us company on the sidelines, working the score and taking pictures.

The weather was awesome. Not too cold, slight breeze, sunny...as perfect as you can get for Sudbury in Winter.

Joel's catch against PULers (Frogger: "Keep going!")

Rumble strips on the highway keeping me on the road.

Lynchy, with his usual high percentage of Lynchers, uh, I mean hammers.

Jess causing countless turnovers while marking.

Hummus.

Frogger's beer point.

That game I made all those deep D's.

Laying out in the snow.

Playing the PULers twice (you got lucky cascade seeding...).

Beating the PUL'ers twice.

Matt getting us the Silva/Henderson fight, and explaining what was going on.

Throwing with gloves on.

Sarah constantly running.

The Swiss Chalet victory meal.

Nat almost laying out.

Winning!

If you're friends with Bonners, well then you're friends with me.

Well done Hounds on Ice! Same time next year?

Nature has slaughters too

2008-03-05T23:16:00.004-05:00

I don't really have too much to say about Monday's game. I'm kinda tired. Maybe it was Snowplate. Maybe it was playing hockey and then ultimate the day after Snowplate. Maybe I'm stupid.

We beat MOB 29-7 the day after Hounds on Ice won Snowplate. The game wasn't really ever in doubt, although we were a little sloppy at the beginning of the game. Our defense was excellent, as evident by only giving up 7 points. That is pretty impressive, considering MOB was the team that I'm Idahucker beat in the Tuesday finals. This MOB team does look a little different than the summer team. Not sure if they're any better or worse...just different.

Anyways, we beat this MOB almost as badly as how these Japanese Hornets beat a mob of Honey Bees.

Thanks to Mr. Roman for showing me this. Sweet merciful crap!

We're as cold as ice

2008-02-27T19:39:00.006-05:00

OK, here is a drunken promise made one night to Nat and Tien: the "Hounds on Ice" theme song. I was thinking the italicized part could be part of this weekend's post-game spirit thingy.

(With apologies to Foreigner)

Hounds on Ice

We are Hounds on Ice, we’re willing to sacrifice, our warmth.

Frisbee is our vice, Monday we’ll pay the price, we know

We’ve seen it before it happens all the time,
We’re throwing the disc, we leave our mark behind
We layout for glory, not throwing away
The disc in the endzone, come Monday we’ll pay

We are Hounds on Ice, Flatball in the snow and ice, we love
We found paradise, but our legs have paid the price, we know

We’ve seen it before, it happens once a year
Snowplate is no chore, so crack open a beer
We’re all here for fun, here’s to a great day
(Hooray for) [insert opponents’ name], and thanks for the game

Hounds on Ice – you know that we are
Hounds on Ice – The Hounds on Ice disc team
Hounds on Ice

We are Hounds on Ice, roll the dice, it’s cold, yes it’s cold
We are Hounds on Ice, cold as ice, we know, oh yes we know
We are Hounds on Ice, steam some rice, to go, oh yes to go
We are Hounds on Ice…(fade)

Snowplate Training Session

2008-02-26T22:48:00.009-05:00

9am. Bell rings. Class begins.

Teacher: Okay, settle down everyone, time to get at it. We'll continue our work on Snowplate preparation.

Students take their seats. They are all dressed in purple for some reason.

Teacher: Now, yesterday we heard reports from Tien and Lyanne about what to bring to Snowplate. Bonnie, what's one thing we learned?

Bonnie: Umm...our feet will get wet...and I'm bringing Guitar Hero.

Teacher: That's true. And what's another thing, Joel?

Joel: Lyanne's getting beer...oh, and there's a hot tub.

Teacher: Correct. So, I wanted to show this yesterday, but we ran out of time. It's a Snowplate Training video so you can get an idea of what it's like this weekend, hopefully. I like showing videos, as it allows me to space out for 5 minutes.

[Note: for those in a hurry, 1:14, 2:54 and especially 3:15 are the best scenes. Nice catch Pierre! Graham with an Layout D!]

Help me, I can't think for myself

2008-02-26T16:43:00.005-05:00

A rogue group of Hounds and friends will be going up to Sudbury this weekend, to take part in Snowplate. This is the second time in three years that "Hounds on Ice" have made the trek up north, and it looks like we'll have lots of fun, and maybe even do some damage (not just to our livers). But more on that later.

The important issue that must be decided, is whether or not we should bring this:

Of course, this was given to me at End of Summer party at the Wongs. It looks like we could have some fun with it, although breakage is definitely a concern. What do you think? Should we bring it? See below for an artist's rendition of what it will look like:

Place your vote in the poll!

Christian refuses to waive no-trade clause

2008-02-25T22:03:00.015-05:00

Citing "what's best for me," Christian has announced that he will not waive his no-trade clause, meaning that he will remain with Release the Hounds for the remainder of the season. This puts to an end the rampant speculation that Hounds GM Simon Maycock would engineer a trade by Tuesday's 3pm deadline.

"We looked at every different angle in terms of what my position has been and the situation of where I am at this stage of my career and all of that," said Christian. "I think at the end, I followed my heart and I just haven't felt the desire to go to any other team or play for any other team at this point."

It appears that in the end, he was swayed by his loyalty to the Hounds and the city of Toronto. "The Hounds have always had faith in me, ever since they brought me in from Zuma. Even when I pull out the money-maker, I know they believe I can do it. I can't walk away from that."

It was thought that the Beach team was looking to add him for depth, however, there may be more to the story. There have been whispers that the team most interested in acquiring Christian was MMV.

When asked about this report, Christian was quick to respond: "Fuck that shit."

From the guys that brought you Napoleon Dynamite

2008-02-24T21:24:00.004-05:00

Next up is Sasquatch and The Dumpling Gang at 11pm on Field A. They were one of the top-4 ranked teams to start the season, but have lost to both the Disciples of Love and The Ultimate Volleyball Team. Let's be sure to make it 0-3 for the Gang.

As for their team name, it's from the movie "The Sasquatch Dumpling Gang" (or is it "The Sasquatch Gang"?). The title of the this post is the tag-line on the poster, even though the Director of Sasquatch was only the First Assistant Director on Napoleon Dynamite, so it's a bit of an exaggeration.

Wow, I sounded like a big movie geek there.

I actually haven't seen the movie...or heard of it before today. But where else you can't get this kind of extensive research?

This calls for a Bud Light parody

2008-02-19T19:20:00.007-05:00

The poll results came to fruition, as we beat the Apostles of Love (since not all of the Disciples were there) 26-16. Even though it wasn't their full squad, we beat a team using players from Touring teams such as Zen, Too Bad and Big Hammers. Great job, since apparently having Touring players is the most important way to identify yourself as being good.

Even after a slow start, once we got our offense going the game was ours. On defense we took advantage of some sloppy play (too many subs for DoL) to keep them at a very low total.

In other Family Day news; while Lyanne was in Montreal forgetting about us, Christian was busy playing with his camera and YouTube. Below are two clips: one is awesomely funny, while the other has Will Ferrell in it.

Now what are we gonna do?

2008-02-18T14:13:00.008-05:00

Setting: The Ontario Liberals have just convincingly won the 2007 Election. Now they have to figure out which one campaign promise they will actually keep.

Deputy Premier George Smitherman: How about that new February holiday promise we made? Who's going to complain about another day off?

Premier Dalton McGuinty: Perfect! Okay people, we need to cook up a new holiday for the winter. Something to distract the people from realizing I don't work from mid-December to mid-March.

Minister of Finance Dwight Duncan: Oh, I know. Spendover. Like Passover, less talk, more presents. It'll help the economy.

McGuinty: No, no, no! Tory proved that the religious angle won't work. No, it's gotta be warm and fuzzy. Something like, um, "Family Day" but not so lame.

[fast forward 4 months]

Terri McGuinty: Happy Family Day everyone!

And that's how come we're playing Disciples of Love on a holiday Monday. This should be our toughest opponent of the season...until we play them again (my guess: 4 weeks).

Yes, I'd definitely prefer to play Ultimate...

2008-02-12T21:54:00.005-05:00

...especially if that's how all Volleyball players act on the court.

Although, I will kinda give the Ultimate Volleyball Team the benefit of the doubt, since I think frustration had set in for them. I'm sure they had no idea what was in store when they got to BMO: a motivated Hounds team looking to show TUC that we do not belong in this level.

It is disappointing that they felt the need to take away spirit points from us, seeing as how they are the first team to do so in over two years. I'm curious as to how they could justify taking away points for "Rules Knowledge".

I mean, I guess there was that one time when Nadia stopped the game to complain about how her marker wasn't calling stalls correctly... Oh wait, it was their player who did that. And she was wrong. I guess that must prove that we're the team that didn't know the rules...

So, this clip is dedicated to Nadia's nemesis from the Monday. If you're reading this, check out this link after you watch this trippy little video...

Seriously though...41-11 is quite the smackdown. Impressive work, but we can't get ahead of ourselves...there are a lot better teams in the division, so we can't allow our heads to get too big. Even though we think we should be in Elite, we still have to prove it. Every week is a test, and Monday's game will likely be the toughest one of the season.

I'd much rather play Ultimate than Volleyball

2008-02-10T22:33:00.000-05:00

Maybe our opponents feel the same way.

Tonight we start the Winter Season with a game against The Ultimate Volleyball Team at BMO. Let's get this season started with a big win against one of the other top-ranked teams.

To be honest, when I think of the Ultimate Volleyball Team, the first thing that comes to mind is Super Spike V'Ball, which I played a lot in my Nintendo years. My "team" was definitely the real Ultimate Volleyball team, as I ruled that game. I still remember my friend Shawn cheering me on as I beat the USSR to win the World Cup. It was one of the games that was usually in my rotation; games like Ice Hockey, Tetris, Contra and Baseball. I played V'ball so much that I changed the game lengths so it was a game of 5; after awhile I thought it was unnecessary to continually beat the teams 15-0.

I usually chose to play as the "tough" team, as they almost had the biggest spikes. That they were the worst defenders didn't matter...it was always fun to kaboom the crap out of all the teams. An excellent way to relieve stress. Oh Mr. McGee, you thought a pop quiz today would be fun...? KABOOM!!

Now that I think of it, it kinda makes me want to pull out my NES and take on the World Cup. You think it's okay to play like a jackass at your rec floor hockey game? KABOOM!!

So what does all of this have to do with the team we're playing at BMO. Uh...nothing.

In the Fall I think they competed in the Tuesday 5's League, which means they could be rusty if they haven't had a good run since December. I also played against them with I'm Idahucker in the Summer, a game with we won 17-8, so take that for what it's worth.

Another season, another recap

2008-02-08T20:52:00.000-05:00

The "Fall" season came to an end on Monday with the Hounds on the bad end of a 21-20 score to TURD. We took advantage of some quick (and uncharacteristic) turnovers close to TURD's endzone, but were unable to maintain that lead. We had some trouble when we tended to hold onto the disc too long, but when we moved it quickly we were more successful than Bonnie paying off her student loan. After the sweet start, TURD used their deep threats to come back and take the lead. We were able to keep it close for most of the game, but a furious comeback resulted in the Hounds coming up just one point short in the 3rd place game.

So, we finished the Fall Season with a 4-6 record. While we'd rather be on the sunny side of .500, we can look at the positives of beating the "elite" Bush League All-stars in the quarterfinals (which guaranteed our final 4th placing), having two somewhat solid games against the Sofa Kings, defeating the solid Disciples of Love to start the season, and giving Monster and TURD legitimate scares.

Christian has ideas, he's drunk, and he bleeps the Prom Queen

At least one Hound won something on Monday...Christian's blog, Idea Drunk, won the Best Business/Finance Blog category for the Canadian Blog Awards. You may recall Christian soliciting your votes by his "Hey, look at my drunk friend" campaign, which no doubt had as deep an impact as that movie...what was it called again...? Oh yeah, Armageddon.

Of course, if there's no "Best Ultimate Team Blog" category, then it's really hard to take these awards seriously.

(OK, I made this joke already on Idea Drunk, but I think it's funny so I'm using it again)

You don't look like Tanaka

Why is it that I feel like we're Frank Dux trying to compete at the Kumite? We thought we had arrived to Elite, ready to kick some ass (or, at least try to), only to have our acceptance questioned. I would have hoped that crushing the brick that is the Bush League All-Stars (in the quarterfinals!) would have been enough, but apparently not.

[Did you notice my Hong Kong doppelganger? No, not Dux's weaselly tour guide...]

TUC thinks we should use this opportunity to develop our team, although I must say that it's tough to seriously develop while playing Indoor 6's; it's not exactly the same game that we play in the Summer.

There is a small light at the end of the tunnel though, and they mentioned that they keep an eye on the competition, so maybe if we play well we'll get a chance to go up against some of the top teams. Although to be honest, I'm about as skeptical of that happening as I am when I received that email from the Honourable Henry Mbenga promising me untold riches if I help him to transfer millions of dollars from Nigeria.

I don't know about you, but I'd like to use this "opportunity" to prove that we belong in the top division. Let's continue to play hard for 60 minutes each Monday and get that +/- as high as we can.

We better have some socials at some point this season

Did you get the latest issue of Layout? Apparently BMO is coming down a teensy bit earlier than they originally thought, which means we could have some Friday games at the end of the season. If we get stuck in Competitive for the whole season, we'll have Friday games on March 28th and April 4th. This will also means that the break between Winter and Spring games will be over a month and a half! Be prepared ready for some practices so we avoid getting rusty.

The original flying disc

This year's Pie Plate (note: PDF) came out recently and the Hounds could be found throughout:

Page 3 - Honoured as one of nine teams who maintained a perfect perfect spirit point record from the Sumer. Oh yeah, we were also perfect in the Fall! Take that, bitches! I mean...uh...[English accent] nice play, my good sport.
Page 7 - A picture of a dashing young gentleman exhibiting perfect form on a flick.
Page 9 - Pictures of winning teams including Monday Champs Big Hammers (Lyanne and Nat...although this picture was from the Mid-Season Tournament...Lyanne and Nat weren't on the Monday Hammers...they were on a better team on Mondays); Tuesday Champs I'm Idahucker (Chris and Nat, not pictured: Christian at V-Fest); and Sunday Fall Champs Red October (super-sub Marc).

They had hard copies of Pie Plate available at BMO on Monday; perhaps they will have them there this Monday, if you want a paper copy to read while you're watching MASH and playing with your hula hoop.

Phew, that was a long one...

That's right. It's a funny name.

2008-02-03T23:45:00.000-05:00

Monday night is the final game of this season, where we find ourselves in the 3rd Place game against TURD. 10pm, Field A. Let's end this session on a hight note.

After all, everyone knows that Turd Ferguson isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer:

Vote or Die

Don't forget to vote by Noon on Monday on what we are going to do. Right now it looks like we're going out for beers anyway (details TBA), but let's make it real official-like. While it's still up in the air if Christian's baby-makers get a booting, it looks like we're not going to make TURD cry. It's your duty to exercise your right to vote...don't make me get Puff Daddy on your case:

Interestingly enough (or not, depending on your maturity level...mine's low), this song was from the "Douche and Turd" episode where the kids of South Park Elementary have to vote for the new school mascot: a Giant Douche or a Turd Sandwich.

Meanwhile, on Field B

The real Super Bowl game is also being played at 10pm on Monday. Sofa King: We Taught It is up against Monster. I'm giving the edge to the Sofa Kings, although Monster can definitely pull off the upset. If the Giants can beat the Patriots, then anything can happen.

Sofa Kings' Secret Weapon

2008-01-29T22:43:00.000-05:00

We figured it was going to be a difficult game last night, and that was indeed the case. A slow start sure didn't help as we came out and promptly gave up the first five points. Where did that come from? We usually stutter to start the second half, not the first half!

After that ignominious start, we gathered ourselves and got to the task of actually playing in a semifinal game against the top-ranked team. I'm actually quite pleased with how we played. The effort was there, and we definitely made the Sofa Kings work for every point. After beginning down 5-0, the rest of the game was 21-19...still for the bad guys, I'm sure you'll agree: that's more like it! I think we can hold our heads high with the way we played.

However, it does show that we still need to improve so we can reach our goal of taking over the world. Here are some of my thoughts on what we can do to be better:

Dump at stall 4. This gives the thrower and the dump time to make eye contact for the pass.
Keep shifts short. Hockey players usually take 30-45 second shifts. I think a 2 minute shift is about right.
Swing off the line. Any time you catch the disc near the force sideline, your first look should be for a swing pass.
Reset to handlers near the endzone. Let the handlers handle and the cutters cut.
Any other ideas?

The Sofa Kings also deserve some props for their weekend result: making the finals of the Trouble in Vegas tournament against Team Fisher Price. Unfortunately they came up a couple points short, losing 14-12 to TFP, otherwise known as the 2007 Canadian National Champions. Not too shabby!

Although...after some research I'm not sure that everything was on the up and up. I think they might have had some help:

But were they born on a pirate ship?

2008-01-27T19:31:00.000-05:00

After last week's upset victory, we're in the semifinals against Sofa King: We Taught It. We had a tough time with them last time losing by 11, but from what I recall the game seemed closer than the score indicated.

While it's going to be difficult to defeat a team with lots of GOAT and Tombstone players, we do have a ray of light shining through the storm clouds. Some of the Sofa Kings were playing in Trouble in Vegas (gotta love their motto "Three years and still no deaths (to our knowledge)") this weekend, and will be taking a red-eye flight back to Toronto. Hopefully they did really well and played as many games as possible that went to universe point and then went out and partied really hard and didn't sleep all weekend (basically, I hope they're tired).

Even if all those things did actually happen, the game is still going to be... (whoosh) Sofa King tough!

A sign that the Apocalypse is upon us

2008-01-25T22:34:00.001-05:00

From: Christian Parsons

Subject: Re: Hounds @ BMO - Jan 28th

Simon,

I think the game is at 9pm, not 10pm.

2798 21:00 - 21:55 BMO A Sofa King: We ... Release The Ho...

- Christian

From: "Maycock, Simon"

Subject: Hounds @BMO - Jan 28th

Hounds,

Semi-Finals next week, and we play the #1 seed...Sofa Kings! Same roster as last week except Nadia back in for Connie.

Time 10pm

Versus Sofa Kings

Place BMO A

Roster

Guys Chris, Tien, SImon, Joel, Christian, Austin, Owen, Marc

Gals Nat, Bonnie, Lyanne, Nadia (in for Laura)

Subs

Marc in for Mark W

Simon

Christian correcting Simon on the schedule? Has hell frozen over? Are pigs flying?

How else to explain this? I think it's a sign from God, but don't quote me on that.

We must be headed for a disaster of biblical proportions.

This must mean Old Testament, real wrath-of-God type stuff...fire and brimstone coming down from the skies. Rivers and seas boiling!

Forty years of darkness; earthquakes, volcanoes!

The dead rising from the grave!

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together...mass hysteria!

What Really Grinds My Gears

2008-01-25T21:21:00.000-05:00

You know what really grinds my gears? People who don't freaking signal when I'm driving behind them. I see you there, talking on your cell about how annoying Nancy in Accounting is while changing songs on your iPod because you really wanted to hear that Colbie Caillat song again because it reminds you of that summer before Grade 12 when you went all the way with that cute hockey player and he totally would have gone out with you except he was leaving for Michigan in a month and he was afraid of having to break up. Well here I am, stuck waiting behind you through the entire freaking green light when all I want is to get home so I can watch OC re-runs and drink a few beers, but not all of my beers because the cheap-ass plastic bag from the Beer Store split open so one of the bottles smashed on the ground. What the hell? You people recycle everything, right? Try recycling up some tensile strength so my beer doesn't explode on the floor while I'm rushing through the door...and freaking signal! I CAN'T READ YOUR MIND!

And that's what grinds my gears.

If you were a man I'd punch you right in the mouth

2008-01-22T18:34:00.000-05:00

Good evening, I'm Ron Burgundy, and here's what's happening in your world tonight.

Release the Hounds won their flatball game against the Bush League All-stars by a score of 19-18 in a game played late Monday night at BMO Field.

The Hounds started off hotter than Lyanne's jacuzzi in Sudbury, attacking the All-Stars deep to take an early lead, which, with the help of some hard-nosed defense and quick disc movement helped the Hounds to win the rematch. Of course, this was the second of back-to-back games between the two squadrons, and rumour has it that this game had playoff implications. Here's one anchorman who is hoping that was indeed the case.

You stay classy Hounds. I'm Ron Burgundy.

And...scene.

To keep with the Anchorman theme, check out the clip that was the inspiration. If you heard Christian and I before the game (I know...no one actually listens to us) then you heard it to.

It's a long clip, so if you're in a hurry, here are some highlights:

:00 -- Cannonball!

:38 -- That's bush...bush league.

5:20 -- I love lamp.

8:17 -- Afternoon Delight.

Oh, and Sid Seixeiro: It's funny to say the "classy" line every so often. When you do it every day, it's annoying. Please stop.

RTH Libs

2008-01-21T19:02:00.000-05:00

Apparently, there could be stretches of time where updates on this blog are a little less frequent. I know, crazy to consider, but still possible. Anyway, should that happen, please bookmark this post should you require new material.

Pre-Game

Sorry I haven't posted in awhile, but I've been [lame excuse] and so it's been tough to [lamer excuse].

Anyways, big game tonight, Hounds! We're playing [chump team] at [late time] o'clock at [field name]. So far, they've beaten [chump team] but have also lost to [chump team]. We definitely have to [expression meant to convey the need to try really hard]. Let's try to [verb] on our [adjective] stack offense so we can keep improving.

[And now here's a random YouTube clip that has something to do with the name of the team we're playing]:

Post-Game

[Positive superlative] game last night Hounds! I was a little worried when [random mistake, loss of consecutive points, etc...] happened, but after that [negative adjective] start, we really started playing like [occupation]. I don't think we've ever played any better.

Defensively we really played well, especially Owen and Joel who must have had at least [number] layout D's. And could you believe that Austin and Laura both got Callahans? And it seemed like Bonnie and Lyanne got something like [number] hand-blocks.

On offense, we moved the disc very [adverb], and had our share of stand-outs as well. From Christian pulling out the full-field [currency noun]-maker, to Nat's [number] layouts we had it going on. Then there was Tien successfully completing his [gymnastic tumble] pass for a point. I can't believe I actually skied [their tallest and best player] to bring that down! But the best had to be Simon and his [number] Greatests! Simply amazing!

[And now here's a random YouTube clip that has something to do with the name of the team we just beat]:

So, if it's been awhile since I've updated the blog, just fill in the blanks for a brand new post.

Shut up. That's why.

2007-12-17T12:44:00.001-05:00

I admit I've been a bad little blogger. It's almost been a month since I posted anything on Release the Hounds, and Bonnie, Pierre and Christian are all making me look bad. So, why has it been so long since I've graced you with my presence? Is it because I'm lazy? Or just really busy? Umm...just look to the title of the post.

So, tonight we have a game against Superfreaky. My crack team of scouts tells me they are 2-1-1. Other than that, I don't know much about them. All I do know is that as a team we must support each other...no matter how horribly inappropriate our actions happen to be on the field.

Do the Monday Countdown

2007-11-20T17:30:00.000-05:00

It's been a couple of months, but Release the Hounds made their way back onto the pitch last night, taking on the Disciples of Love to open the "Fall" TUC League. After some initial suckiness by both sides, The Hounds were able to forge ahead and take the first game of the season, 32-27 (give or take 5 points). Lyanne will work to keep that perfect record as Field Captain next week.

I thought our offense was solid, but also a little sporadic. I heard something about using horizontal, but it seemed that we didn't really have much structure. But it's the first game, and I'm sure we'll shore that up.

Even though the HHH wasn't there (cough Wongs cough!), I have been informed that the winner was Joel, thanks to his great hustle on offense, and domination on defense. I'm sure it has nothing to do with guilting him for the fact he's missing the next two weeks.

Some things to note:

1) BMO is a nice field...if you're into things like soft turf and lots of space.
2) The fast pace of speedpoint suits our style.
3) Subs rule! Big Dan, Tyler, Sarah...glad we had them there.
4) 11pm games...BOO!
5) That scoreboard was too confusing to operate...our trouble with it means one thing: we need Cindy back!

When I saw that we were playing the Disciples of Love, I was trying to find some inspiration for the post. All I could find on them was their old site, which is pretty much a BBS that has been spammed worse than my old Hotmail account.

For me, there is another group that I consider to be the true Disciples of Love:

A Eulogy for my beard

2007-11-14T22:57:00.000-05:00

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away (i.e. last December in the Philippines) I started growing you. Since there was little access to hot water, I found out very quickly that shaving wasn't going to be an option. Plus, I'm lazy and didn't want to.

Since then, we've been through a lot together. You kept me warm in the winter months, and really hot in the summer. But that's ok.

You were there when I became the Field Captain, lending an air of respectability and confidence so I could lead the Hounds. Without you, we would have crashed and burned at the playoffs. Oh wait, never mind...

You made me look much older...I don't think I've been carded at the Beer Store since you've been around. There's no way I would have been able to join up with that Master's team at Nationals had I been clean-shaven.

Along with that, you've allowed me to appear dignified and made all of my actions look distinguished...like that time I got really drunk and went streaking through the quad.

But that has all come to an end. One of my best friends just got married, and since I was in the wedding party I needed to clean up. It's only been a week, but right now there's a whole in my heart that I'm not sure can be filled.

I guess what I'm trying to say is...I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the mark, when he made Pearl Harbor.

For those who haven't seen me since the shaving...

Before:

After:

Free Rice

2007-11-07T17:31:00.000-05:00

No, this doesn't have anything to do with Condoleezza being indicted, this is a fun little game that helps to feed the world while enriching your vocabulary.

As you correctly answer questions, 10 grains of rice will be donated to the United Nations World Food Program.

It's actually quite addictive. Even Homer Simpson loves it: "Oh, I love your game. My favorite section is 'How to increase your word power.' That thing is really, really, really... good."

Go to www.freerice.com to play and feed the world.

Thanks to Laura for showing me this site. The amount of rice earned today may be inversely proportional to the amount of work she accomplished.

Dude, that is so inappropriate...

2007-10-31T12:20:00.000-04:00

Satan's minion: Satan we have a problem, one of the guests has turned up in a Crocodile Hunter costume, and it's really offending some of the other guests.

Satan: Oh Jesus (Walks across the party to a guest in a Crocodile Hunter outfit.) Erm, ah the whole Crocodile Hunter thing, it's just not cool. He like only died a few weeks ago! You're gonna have to go.

Steve Irwin: But Satan it's me, Steve Irwin. I am the Crocodile Hunter!

Anyone can dress up as a clown, hobo, slutty [insert female occupation here]. But the best costumes require thought, originality, and perhaps a dark soul that will be going to hell.

Our friend, Michael Vick. Yes, that is a pile of dead dogs on the floor.

The pressure of coming up with a cool costume must have gotten to the guy on the left. How else to explain his Owen Wilson get-up?

This would have been a good one, you know, if OJ did it...

Oh man...

Happy Halloween!

Yes! He's back (well...in January)

2007-10-25T23:39:00.000-04:00

While watching the Red Sox take a commanding lead in the World Series (which is bad news, right Simon?) a ray of sunshine poked through the clouds of this dreary situation.

That's right, Jack's back! The only TV show that I actually take the time to watch new episodes, 24, is returning on January 13th. I guess Keifer Sutherland apparently took some time from his busy schedule to film Season 7.

The big change for the season is that CTU is no more. After being bombed, gassed, taken over by the Chinese and infiltrated by about 15 moles, it looks like the American government decided that perhaps a change was necessary. For more on the upcoming season, click here to see the trailer.

If you haven't seen any of the previous seasons, then I'm very disappointed in you. However, you can make it up to me by borrowing the DVD's from me so you can experience the utter awesomeness of the show.

Set your clock: only 80 more days.

Native American Summer

2007-10-22T13:19:00.000-04:00

It's always nice when we're graced with an Indian Summer, it's just too bad one of those days is a Monday, while I'm stuck in the office trying to figure out how people can get so riled up about a Recreational Floor Hockey game.

And while yesterday was also great, my time was taken up by a Home Depot Saturday (even though it was Sunday):

"Well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, we're going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have enough time. " - Frank the Tank

But at least I got that ottoman and those lights I needed...

If you can get outside and throw the disc around before the sun goes down, then do it. There won't be many days like this for quite a long time...

A "Thank You" from the Player of the Year

2007-10-18T15:30:00.000-04:00

Hello Hounds,

I’d like to apologize for being nearly asleep for most of Saturday evening. I guess that’s what happens when someone my age only gets a couple hours of sleep.

In any case, after a day of sleep to recover and a few hectic days at work I can finally do this properly.

THANK YOU EVERYONE for awarding me “The Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence: Player of the Year”! I have to say that I was very surprised….which is probably the only sentiment that I was able to convey on Saturday night. I am also very honoured to be awarded such a great group of friends and team mates because you are all people and players that I hold in high regard.

I feel there are many players who are more deserving than I, not the least of whom is Chris for his outstanding leadership throughout the season. I had a bit of a rocky summer season this year which seemed to mirror parts of the Hounds’ season. In the end though I remembered why I play this game and what a talented group of people I have the privilege of playing with. It’s fun to play with people who can all learn a little something from each other to grow as a team. I was able to learn from each of you and I can only hope that I brought even a fraction of the amount I learned to the team. So there you have it, this award belongs to all of you!

Chris: awesome job on the trophy! I might have to look into getting it bronzed.

Oh yeah….thank for coming by on Saturday everyone! I hope you enjoyed the food and company….and that you all had enough to eat.

Cheers,
Tien

So much more humble than Gollum when he won his MTV Movie Award in 2003:

Meat-o-rama

2007-10-17T21:38:00.000-04:00

The Wong's sure out-did themselves on Saturday! The Hounds got together for the "Bowling and Beef" end of season party, which was a lot of fun. In true Hounds fashion, the food was plentiful: appetizers, 10 racks of ribs, 2 beer chickens, a beef brisket, 2 trays of potatoes, salad, apple crisp and ice cream sundaes (although I'm sure I'm forgetting something). Due to this overload of food (and the fun), the bowling plan was kiboshed, as we hung out, watch the Leaf's game, tossed the disc around, and tried to digest the feast. Thanks Nat and Tien for hosting.

For those who missed it, we also handed out Paper Plate Awards for the past season (including significant others!), so here they are:

Cindy - The Jumbotron Award - For always keeping score (this has nothing to do with the back that she's 7 months pregnant. Nothing at all.)

Michelle - The Ultimate Widow Award - For dealing with my playing 2 nights a week...plus tournaments...plus me always talking about ultimate.

Steph - The Soon-To-Be Ultimate Widow Award - Joel's back...hope you enjoyed your time with him!

Matt - The Pay-Per-View Award - For his parties featuring wrestling and UFC. Apparently it meant a lot to him:

Pierre - The Awesome Award - What else could it be?

Lyanne - The Accident Waiting to Happen Award - If there's a way to get hurt, Lyanne will find it.

Austin - The Real World Award - Finally finished school, now has a job AND a baby on the way. No baby steps for Austin!

Carla - The Half Full Award - Whether we were winning or losing, Carla was always positive and making suggestions for improvement.

Dan N - The Reluctant Handler Award - For his willingness to drop back and handle even though I know he'd rather go mid or deep. He was close to getting the Jacques Cousteau Award, for his affinity for throwing the deep bomb.

Tien - The Pylon Buddy Award - For always helping me put away the cones on the Field Hockey pitch...much appreciated. He almost got the Potty-mouth Award...

Nadia - The Cool as a Cucumber Award - For always being a rock in the backfield and never losing her cool (apparently this would have been unheard of a few years ago).

Christian - The Energizer Bunny Award - For never stopping on the field. That, or he's pink and bangs a drum all the time.

Laura - The Kick in the Ass Award - For helping to right the ship when the Hounds went off course.

Owen - The Endzone Award - For his domination in that area. It would have been called "The Thomas Granofsky Memorial Award", but Owen doesn't know who the hell that is.

Bonnie - The Incredible Hulk Award - Because you shouldn't get her angry...you wouldn't like it when she's angry...

Dan L - The No No No No Yes! Award - For always completing seemingly impossible passes. It was either that, or the Midvale School for the Gifted Award for best pulls.

Nat - The Rolodex Award - Whenever we needed a player (especially Mid-Season) Nat was always there to find someone to fill in.

Joel - The $6000 Man Award - Because that's about how much knee reconstruction surgery costs OHIP.

Simon - The Daddy Award - Others can be captain, or have kids, but we all know Simon is the Daddy of the Hounds.

Chris - The "The Man" Award - Because I have a penis.

Now, those weren't the only awards that were handed out. Simon out-did himself by awarding me a wicked Captain's Prize: the best bottle of Cognac one could ever hope for:

I'd like to think that the bottle is made for Snowplate and Gender Blender, but I'd be concerned about breakage. Otherwise, here I am enjoying my prize:

The final award was the inaugural "Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achivement in th Field of Excellence". The vote was close, but one person distanced himself with his dedication and rib-cooking. That person: Tien.

Here's a close-up of the award. Thanks to Bonnie for supplying the Mr. Burns bobblehead, and to Tien for helping me to affix it to the disc.

So, that about puts a wrap on the Summer 2007 Season of Release the Hounds. The Indoor Season starts in a month, and remember, the next outdoor season is only 6 months away!

Smithers.
Yessir?
Release the Hounds.

Show's over

2007-10-16T18:49:00.000-04:00

So, it's been a few weeks, but since we just had the Hounds End-of-Season Party, some closure on our Monday shenanigans this past season is in order.

It all started when the lineup of Austin, Bonnie, Chris, Christian, Laura, Lyanne, Nat, Pierre, Simon and Tien was augmented with our best recruits ever: Carla, the Dans, Nadia and Owen. We had new uniforms, we were playing on a new night, we were ready to go.

Instead of going through every game individually (that would be a waste of time), I'll be putting the games into groups.

The Hounds move to Mondays

The initial seedings gave pegged us at 14th...on Mondays we were a relatively unknown team, so we were going to have to earn our place. After our first three games, we overwhelmed the competiton: Drastic Plastic, Grilled Cheese and Flowbee. The games were relatively easy, ending with scores of 17-5, 17-4 and 17-7 respectively. After those first three games, it appeared that we were seeded a little low to start (Oh, you think so, doctor?). While the games were easy, it allowed us to integrate the new players, and bump us up in the ladder, which meant that tougher games were on the horizon.

The Hounds meet the big boys

The big wins to start the season moved us up to play the strong, experienced Monday teams. We started with Disc-Horde, and showed that we did indeed belong in the Top 8 with a convincing 17-11 win. We were feeling good about our new surroundings...approaching the top of the Monday standings. Unfortunately it also raised the ire of everyone else, and they struck hard, struck fast, with no mercy. Lopsided losses to Big Hammers, Mandrew, and Ninjastars were frustrating and they showed the Hounds still had a lot work to do before we could consider ourselves to be among the top Monday teams. But there was more than that...those losses, coupled with the change of nights caused us to stray away from what made the Hounds experience so fun...this was something that had to be remedied. A new plan that would improve our on-field focus to go along with a renwed commitment to social events. Back to Hounds basics: playing well and having fun on and off the pitch.

The Hounds get their shit together

The previous losses meant that we had crashed down the ladder, so we had to work our way back up to get to where we knew we belonged. With central leadership on the field, we put forth solid efforts against Hootenanni Pussywillows, El Kabong and 4D. The Hounds also finished 7th in the Mid-Season Tournament that was enhanced with the some friends ("enhanced" meaning Nat and I emailed everyone we know to get enough players to get a team in).

The Hounds vs the big boys 2: The Legend of Simon's Gold

The three big wins in a row resulted in another jump in the standings, which meant another run at the top teams, with the first game against the venerable Mandrew. We knew going in it was going to be a challenge, and while the score did not reflect it, we gave a much better effort. Of more importance though was the roster shuffle: the returrn of Joel from knee surgery and Pierre's final game.

Following that game, we defeated two of the second-tier Monday teams, Fisheyes and Disc-Horde. These games were sandwiched around Nationals, which had quite the Hound presence, with Carla, Chris, the Dans, Laura, Lyanne, Nat and Tien taking part.

Going into the final two games, we were up against two of the elite Monday teams, and earned our 4th place regular season finish with ties against both Ruckus and Big Hammers. It was a great finish to the season, as we very well could have won both of those games.

A tough pill to swallow

With those big results against the Hammers and Ruckus, the Hounds were primed to do some serious damage at the playoffs. However, due to a confluence of work, family and travel commitments...it created the perfect storm that caused us to miss the Playoff Tournament. Needless to say, it was extremely disappointing.

Regardless of that, it was still a great season. We went 9-4-2, and ended up with a perfect spirit rating. We had a lot of fun, and we continued to put the Hounds name out there. I know I'm looking forward to next year.

Why Bonnie missed the Hammers

2007-09-11T00:36:00.000-04:00

Sorry I've been away, but we're smack dab in the middle of scheduling at work, which is the busiest time of the year.

I just wanted to share a couple of pictures that Bonnie sent me taken from her vacation that should be of interest:

Oh yeah...Happy Birthday Bonnie!

Dear Pierre

2007-08-29T19:32:00.000-04:00

Well, Monday's game certainly had its ups and downs. In the last regular season game, we managed a 14-14 draw against Big Hammers, the 2nd-ranked team on Monday. Now, I missed the last game against Big Hammers, but I believe this was a vast improvement. Well done!

After a slow start (down 6-2 I believe) we went on a tear, taking half 9-8. We played through our initial struggles and asserted ourselves on O and D. Good use of a timeout somewhere in there. That being said, we started poorly, and struggled to the finish. We need to be focused right from the start, and not tense up near the end. I felt that we lost some of our aggression on offense near the end, and that cost us.

I think Simon summed it up pretty well in a note on Pierre's blog, which he has been updating a lot so far (I wonder if he can keep it up...tee hee..."keep it up"...):

Pierre!
Your place looks awesome - very nice. Just wanted to give you the update about last night's game since you didn't show up. We drew 14-14 with Big Hammers.

The same Big Hammers that placed 7th in the country?

Yes Piere, the very same.

That note is almost as good as this letter:

David vs Goliath

2007-08-27T14:20:00.001-04:00

Big game tonight against Big Hammers. No insider info on this one...however, we do know they finished 7th at Nats, have only lost to Mandrew this year, and will likely play a zone d. It's going to be a very tough game, but let's see if the good guys can win this one.

Since it just wouldn't be a post without some sort of video, here's a classic Gravey and Jobriath episode:

Really!?!

2007-08-23T17:34:00.000-04:00

Even though we are called "Release the Hounds", I believe that none of us actually own a dog. Even so, Michael Vick's actions just boggle the mind, and I have to say something.

Now that Vick has plead guilty to all those dog-fighting charges, one just has to wonder what in Scooby Doo's name was he thinking? Even if you ignore the sheer cruelty of dog fighting (and executing the losers...WTF!), how did he think that in the Internet era this was not going to come out? Britney Spears can't even get out of a car without everyone seeing her naughty bits, so how did Vick think he'd keep this quiet?

I mean, he's one of the highest-paid and marquee players in all of the NFL...did he think that taking part (or running, as it's appears) in dog-fighting wasn't going to be made public some time? I mean, if Brad Pitt was to start his own real-life Fight Club, how long until someone breaks the first two rules? A week? A day?

Of course, Michael Vick has never really proven himself to be a man of good judgement (and that has nothing to do with his 49/38 touchdown to interception ratio over the past 3 seasons...zing!). This whole situation reminds me of what he did back in January, which was summed up best by Seth and Amy of Weekend Update.

So, what was he thinking? That's the problem...he just doesn't think.

Bring Da Ruckus

2007-08-19T23:38:00.000-04:00

On Monday we play the final of the 'Big 4" Monday night teams: Ruckus. Considering they have only lost to Mandrew and Big Hammers this season, it's going to be quite the challenge. Of note, this team has a Hound connection in Rob Camp: TUC team-ranker extraordinaire and Hound on Saturday at TUF.

As the Wu-Tang Clan says..Bring da Ruckus (and your A game):

It's never good when it goes bad

2007-08-19T21:03:00.000-04:00

I find that performace videos are pretty lazy: usually they're done while the band is on tour and their record company realizes "Crap, we need to get them a new single in rotation down at MTV (or MTV2 now, since MTV doesn't actually show music videos anymore)." Rarely is there anything that hasn't already been done in thousands of previous music videos. And the band always says lame things like "We just wanted to express our live energy in video form." Zzzz...

Well, Local H's video for "All the Kids are Right" brings the concert experience alive, but uses only two people (band members Scott Lucas and Brian St. Clair...there are only 2 in the band) to act out the parts of everyone at the concert...definitely different than the usual tripe.

This video reminds me of my high school days, going to concerts at the Hideaway (a basement dive in St. Catharines), and seeing all those characters throughout the night at a concert. From the scalpers and bouncers outside, to the roadies and T-shirt vendors inside, it kinda makes me want to check out the next Alexisonfire show.

Considering Local H never really made it big, it's impressive that they were able to give this video the same treatment as The Matrix. When released, this video (and album for that matter) received little fanfare, and is typically ignored when people make a Best Videos list. But any video where the lead singer gives himself "come-f*ck-me" looks...well, how can you exclude it?

Nat and Tien beat me to it

2007-08-17T17:22:00.000-04:00

While we're on the subject of video-taping awesome plays (or not, as was the case on Tuesday), I believe Nat and Tien have the honour of being the first Hounds to appear on the "Clip of the Day" on UltiVillage. Click here to see their shining moment (look behind Lugsdin).

Now I'm bitter that UltiVillage wasn't at my league game on Tuesday. Or at the game where I skied (skiied? No, that one's for downhill...I think I got it right) our favourite opponent Mad Dog (what an awesome feeling that was). Or at the game where I pulled the disc into the end zone and then caught the first pass for a Callahan. Or...um...ok, that's all I got for 4 years-worth of playing ultimate. Dammit...I suck.

Memo to UltiVillage:

You can be boring and follow the tournament circuit...sure, Furious and DoG will make great plays from time to time. But if you want some real footage, you should follow me around to capture the one highlight-worthy play I manage to pull off each year. I think it'll be worth the investment.

If Big Brother is watching us...

2007-08-15T18:39:00.000-04:00

...can I have the tape?

As Christian mentioned in the Nationals wrap-up, last night while playing with I'm Idahucker I was able to complete a "greatest"...for a point no less! Of course, I'm sure the reason why Christian wanted to tell everyone is because he was the one who caught it in the end-zone (although he did have to fight Thomas and Janelle for it).

Does this count as bragging though? I just want to keep you all updated in important Hounds news...I think it's eventful enough to warrant a post (hell, I've done a post on a stupid Jeep commercial, so I think this is okay to write about).

Nat was right that it is my second career greatest, and I know she would remember since she caught my first one in 2005 (for a point as well!).

Now, if only I could do that cartwheel throw and catch that Tien and Christian do all the time...

A short-handed Horde

2007-08-15T17:52:00.000-04:00

A little belated, but I just want to put a post about the game on Monday. Of course, it was the re-match with Disc-Horde, as apparently they didn't fall for the donut trick. With the windy conditions it gave us our first real chance at a dedicated zone; before we had only used it for the occassional point.

After a slow start, we were able to really clamp down on them, with the cup putting pressure on the mark (trapping worked well) and the mids taking away the easy swing pass. The transition to melt also netted positive results, as we rarely looked disorganized and we able to get on our marks quickly.

On offence, the handlers did a great job on maintaining composure and swinging the disc until the upfield pass was open. Once we broke down the zone we had great flow, while still being chilly with the disc. One thing to work on would be for the poppers to work together more to open up space for each other.

Of course, we were fortunate that Disc-Horde seemed to be a little short-handed...if we play them again, we might have to take greater measures to get through the Horde...

Nationals wrap-up

2007-08-14T23:38:00.000-04:00

The Canadian Ultimate Championships ended on Sunday, and the Hounds who took part had some excellent results.

In Masters, Tien and Chris teamed up with Graham on a pick-up team that was created due to Mule backing out. We gave it our all, but weren't able to overcome the handicap of unfamiliarity and lost every game. But it was a lot of fun to be able to play.

In Open, Dan N's team, Seek the Righteousness, impressed on Saturday and won two games and ended up with a 13th place finish, up from their original 18th seed. Dan L and Too Bad had trouble sustaining the momentum from Friday, as they finished 16th in the country.

In Women's, Carla and the Diggers had a matchup with Storm, who seem to have the Diggers' number. Their bad luck against Storm continued, as the ladies from Montreal prevailed. Diggers bounced back and finished the tournament strong, taking their final two games and 5th place. Laura and Feisty had a great Saturday, winning their first two games and ending up in 10th place, up from their 13th seed. In addition to this, they were also crowned the Spirit Winners for the Women's Division!

Nat, Lyanne and the Big Hammers had a tough Saturday. They lost their quarterfinal to Bostrich, and some dubious calls sure didn't make them feel any better. This was followed by a close loss to Monster, and then a bit of salvation with a win over RIP to take 7th...10 places higher than their original seed!

The Rest of Canada

It was quite impressive to see a full Varsity Stadium take in the action on Sunday. Even the rain during the finals didn't dampen our spirits (just our clothes).

Masters

The story of the over-33 division was Tombstone, which has some players that we'd recognize from Mandrew. They were seeded first, and for good reason. They steam-rolled through the tournament until a reach the finals and a tough match-up with Glum. A strong second half had them pulling away to a victory over the Ottawa side. On the bad side, they lost Morrow on Friday with an achilles injury.

Junior

Dirt rolled through the tournament and came up against an equally-strong Back Bone team from Vancouver. Dirt appeared to have the title in hand, with a lead of 12-7 in a game soft-capped at 14. Back Bone roared back and won the game 14-13 on universe point...ouch. The highlight, or lowlight, was some questionable calls (on both sides) that had fans actually booing 16 year olds!

Mixed

Bytown Flatball Club from Ottawa carried Ontario's hopes against Team Fisher Price from Vancouver. The game was close to start, but TFP went to a four-person cup which BFC seemed to have trouble adapting to, partially due to their strategy of playing three male handlers. TFP was especially strong though, and were full-value for the win.

Women's

Capitals and Traffic engaged in the most entertaining game of the day, with countless layout-d's, lots of calls (Boring!) and intense plays by both sides. Traffic took a late lead, and the Caps seemed to turn the momentum on one of those layout d's, but a throw-away right after sealed their fate.

Open

GOAT put up a valiant fight, but they just could not match the speed, skill and athleticism of Furious George. Their game plan seemed to revolve around striking deep, but they had some trouble converting, whereas Furious were able to take advantage of their chances.

My favourite moment was when a GOAT player scored on a long run on a Furious player, Noel Pullen (who went to my high school; aforementioned for dating my sister). The GOAT player was pumped up and spiked it at Noel's feet. Noel then picked up the disc and chucked it away...it was a great reaction, considering Furious George had a commanding lead at the time.

It was a great Nationals Tournament. Vancouver took four of the five divisions, but Toronto was right there in three of those finals. Hopefully this bodes well for the future of ultimate in the city. Perhaps more of us will be there next year in Calgary...

Time to play: "Where's Tien?"

Nationals: Day 2

2007-08-11T02:07:00.000-04:00

Lots of action today, with there apparently being a near bench-clearing brawl in the GOAT v. Invictus game (near in that it was bench-clearing only...also Simon, why did we go back to the Big Hammers game?), and a "Greatest" for a point for TFP against Snipe. Later that night I confirmed that my sister dated a player on Furious George in high school. Oh, if only I didn't accuse him of cheating on her! *

The biggest story, however, is that Tien and I have magically aged 2 and 4 years and are playing in the Masters Division. Okay, so it's a team of "volunteers" who are taking the place of a team that pulled out at the last minute. What's better than watching ultimate? Playing ultimate. Unfortunately, this means that I don't have a full account of the day's events (doesn't help that the results aren't posted). But on the bright side, I feel like I earned the right to spend $40 on merchandise.

Of course, the real Hound contingent continued on, with the most promising stories being Carla, Lyanne and Nat having made the top 8 in their respective divisions. I believe the Diggers went 2-1 today (losing to powerhouse Capitals). This should put them in 3rd today, meaning they'll play the 2nd place team from the other pool. If the Diggers win their quarterfinal game, they will play Capitals again, so they'll be in tough to advance any further than that. (Fearless prediction: 4th place overall)

Big Hammers went 1-2 today with a win over Mayhem (giving them 3 wins over Ontario teams so far) and losses to TFP and Gecko. This puts Big Hammers in 3rd place in their pool and a tough matchup with Bostrich. A win likely puts them against TFP (uh-oh), with a loss resulting in a fun-looking consolation matchup with Monster. ("I'm putting it on the Internet" prediction: 7th)

Too Bad had a great day going 3-0, including a win over Seek the Righteousness (not sure how STR did). This gives them a shot at 9th, as I think they can win their quarterfinal, but the semis will be tough if they do get there. (No idea predition: 11th place)

As for Feisty, two of their losses (to Capitals and Salty) were somewhat expected (although apparently not allowed to be watched). They then lost a tough one to Catfish, which sets up a very interesting Feisty vs XX quarterfinal. (Promaybely prediction: 11th).

* I didn't really do that.

Day 1 at Nationals

2007-08-10T00:49:00.000-04:00

Bonnie, Simon, Tien and I met at Sunnybrook this morning and watched a whole lot of ultimate. The weather wasn't great, but not bad either (cool, little bit of wind, no sun, a few drops of rain). With 79 teams playing, there was definitely a lot to see. The Hounds' teams had an up-and-down day.

The big news of the day was the impressive showing by Big Hammers. Seeded 17th, they easily won their first two games over Crude and Les Bouettes. Their third game had a showdown with the infamous Snipe, seeded 1st out of all the Mixed teams. After a slow start (down 4-1), Big Hammers turned it on and took control, winning an intense and chippy affair14-11. They were definitely the talk of the port-o-potties. They are now seeded 1st on Friday, so we'll see if they can keep it up as the tournament progresses. My prediction (and keep in mind that I predicted them to win one game Thursday) is that they'll win one game on Friday, putting them in 4th in their pool and in the top 8.

On the Open front, Dan L and Too Bad had a tough start, losing to 14-10 to Invictus after the score was tied at 9-9. This was then followed by them being upset by Q, essentially knocking them out of the running for the top 8. Hopefully they can bounce back and have a shot at 9th.

Dan N had a tough day, as expected. Seek the Righteousness had a small squad and was over-matched in their 4 games. The highlight for Dan had to be playing against Furious George and marking their star, Andrew Lugsdin (pictured below...my camera sucks). Hopefully they have a shot at beating Sherbrooke tomorrow, which appears to be their best shot at a victory. There is also a Dan vs Dan matchup at 10:15 to look forward to.

Laura and Carla started their days on opposing sides, and Diggers (Carla) took it to the less-experienced Feisty (Laura). Unfortunately later in the day, Diggers couldn't pull out the upset over Alberta, so they finished 2nd in their pool and are looking at a potential matchup against Storm in the quarterfinals. Feisty did get the win they needed over Amazone, so they are in the running for the top 8, however their chances are slim. I think they have a win in them tomorrow, but I'm not sure if that will be enough to make the quarters.

Not a bad down for the Hounds, as only one out of five teams finished below their seedings. Hopefully there will be more success as the tournament goes on. For the full results, check out the CUC website.

The Hounds take on Canada

2007-08-09T01:56:00.000-04:00

The Canadian Ultimate Championships are upon us, and the Hounds are well-represented with 6 players taking part. Here's my quick take on their chances this weekend. Please keep in mind that I don't really know what I'm talking about...for rankings from people who have a clue, please check here .

Nat and Lyanne: playing with Big Hammers in Mixed (seeded 5th out of 5 in their pool, 17th overall)

Even though the top team is in their pool (Snipe) this could be the weakest pool of the four. I expect them to beat Les Bouettes, and a win against Liquid or Crude is possible. But considering the Hammers haven't played in a tournament since Mid-Season, I doubt it. My heart says 3rd (to make the Friday playdowns), by my head says 4th and out of the running. Will end the tourney 15th.

Carla: playing on Diggers in the Women's Division (seeded 2nd out of 4 in their pool, 5th overall)

Ontario's second-ranked team will go 3-0 to win their pool, and finish second on Friday to Capitals. I think they can make the semis, but will be in tough against BC's top team, Traffic. I see them finally beating Storm to take the bronze.

Laura: playing on Feisty in Women's (seeded 4th out of 4 in their pool, 13th overall)

In the same pool as Carla and Diggers. Good shot to make it to Friday playdowns (must beat Amazone from Sherbrooke), but it ends there. An 9th place finish is possible, but I 'm going to say they improve on their seeding and finish 11th.

Dan L: playing with Too Bad in Open (seeded 3rd out of 5 in their pool, 12th overall)

Too Bad is notorious for having an ever-changing roster, so we'll see who's coming out. I like them to finish 3rd on Thursday. They need to upset Blackfish and Nads to make it to Saturday, which is doable. After that they hit the wall, and my guess is they'll finish 8th.

Dan N: joining Seek the Righteousness (seeded 5th out of 5 in their pool, 18th overall)

Don't see much happening with this team...0-4 on Thursday is my guess. A 17th place finish would mean a successful weekend for this squad. Hopefully Dan can lead them to some wins.

It should be a fun weekend, and we'll see how my random projections play out. I'm planning on watching lots of flatball over the next 4 days...see you at Sunnybrook (and hopefully Varsity) supporting the Hounds.

In the morning, laughing happy fish eyes; in the evening, floating in the soup

2007-08-06T11:31:00.000-04:00

I actually took this picture on vacation in the Philippines. I knew we'd be playing these jokers someday...

Good win last night Hounds. It got a little tough coming up against their zone, but otherwise we had some very good flow when we were up against a man d. I really like how that has been working the past month and a half. On offense, we've been eating them up...yum.

Defensively we were like Pearl Jam: Better Man. I think we should try to work in some zone before the playoffs, as well as shore up our deep issues. We're still putting lots of pressure on the other teams to make tough plays...we just need to make sure those plays come out in our favour.

Thoughts on how we can improve defensively? How about when we come up against a zone?

Fire = Hot

2007-08-05T18:58:00.001-04:00

Allow me to add the dialogue that this commercial was missing:

[Three men tailgating. One of them is cooking steak. I'd guess one is a construction worker, one is a mechanic, and one just came from the set of The Warriors .]

Guy #1 - "How do you want your steak?"

Guy #2 - "Medium."

Guy #1 - "You?"

Guy #3 - "Medium rare."

[One drip of sauce falls onto the barbecue grill. Tense music plays in the background. The men look like they are fishing and just dropped the last beer into the lake.]

[Better be sure to put the "Do not attempt" disclaimer in case someone is actually dumb enough to do what this guy is going to do.]

Guy #2 - "Let it go. Do you see the bottle you are holding? It has much more sauce in it than the tiny amount that fell on the grill. You still have lots of sauce left. Why do you care? For that matter, why did I just stand up?"

Guy #1 - "But it's A1 steak sauce. Not Heinz, not HP, but A1. It comes first in the phone book!"

[Guy #1 takes off hat, and decides to go in. Flash forward as everyone is looking at an ambulance.]

Guy #1 - "Ith my theak okay?"

Guy #2 - "Um, yeah, it's fine. Not that you'll know now. Did you not ever learn how cooking food with heat works? Is this your first barbecue? I hope that drip of sauce on the dirty grill tasted good, because now you aren't going to be tasting anything for a month. Good one."

Guy #3 - "Dude, you're a moron...dibbs on his steak."

God - "A1 steak sauce. Yeah, it's that important."