The choice is easy...play ultimate

Due to the lack of Hound availability, tonight's game will be sponsored by Subway...

...even though I have provided all of the subs. Heyo!

For those missing the game, you will also miss out on the return of Lyanne from sleeplessness motherhood. But have fun at your Christmas parties/parent's house/trip to the Philippines/snuff film viewing.

Ready, Set, Dodgeball!

This Tuesday we have a rematch against Tony & Carmel, who we lost to in the season opener 27-19.  We'll definitely need to bring our A game.

Some people might think that the name is a reference from The Sopranos, but it's actually 

HOLY CRAP DUDE LOOK OUT FOR THOSE SHOES!!!

Like Fred Flintstone driving around with bald feet

Tonight's game against RUMP should be a good one. Before we started the season, it appeared that they were one of the top 4 teams, so we'll have to be ready for them. And there's no way that I will accept losing to a cut of meat (unless it's a Flat Iron).

The Beastie Boys have also made a song about our game tonight. I was talking to Adam Yauch the other day, and he told me that when they wrote "Shake Your Rump" they actually wanted to say "Kick Rump's Ass." It just didn't fit the rhyming scheme of the song.

I guess we'll just have to abide by the spirit of their original intentions.

Winners can do what they want

This is how the Spider Monkey reacted when it learned that it is playing against the Hounds tonight:

We must be careful though, because Spider Monkeys do have a vicious side. Especially when they are embodied by a 7 year-old ginger kid:

Two letters to the Hounds

Dear First Half Hounds,

Great work.  We were running with a quality team, and were right there trading points with them.  We were working the disc around, running hard and connecting on our strikes.  We played tough defense, making them work, covering the deep and causing turnovers.  There was a lot to like about the way we played.

Regards,

Me

Dear Second Half Hounds,

Boo.

Sincerely,

Me

This is not a button

Ceci n'est pas un bouton

Tonight we are playing "It's not a button" at 10:00 on Field A. This is another one of Kev's teams (although I don't think Kev is on this one), so they will be a solid opponent. Here's hoping that Kev stacked his Tony & Carmel team, so this one won't be as good.

Strategy-wise, we will have to keep in mind that the field is much thinner, so there is less space to work with. Keeping the disc moving, and making solid, smart passes will be very important, because it's going to be more crowded that a Tokyo subway at rush hour.

I had previously asked The White Stripes for some help scouting this team, but unfortunately after years of loud music and drugs, I think Jack White didn't hear me correctly. Although if this team was a button, I'm sure it would be the hardest button to button.

Pre-game Rock Bandage

Don't forget to come early to my place for some Rock Band. I'll have some snacks and beverages there, but probably not enough for a complete dinner.

I can't wait to hear Simon sing Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld!

Giving the people what they want

So I do one serious ultimate post and get a complaint:

You've changed man. Your posts used to be a quick reference to the Simpsons, maybe a clip from Family Guy or a weird 90s band that nobody remembers. Now you're all serious about strategy and stuff.

And I'm still the only one who reads this. Cater to your audience!

When you say that, it makes me have a Sadgasm...

A refresher on Speedpoint

I played my first indoor game of the season last night, right after playing my final outdoor game of the season. Thank Jeebus indoor is starting, because it was colder than Hell in a Capital One commercial. Seriously, I haven't worn that many layers to play Ultimate since Snowplate. Come to think of it, it might have actually been warmer at Snowplate!

So, some important rule differences to note about Speedpoint:

1. Stall Count is 8, not 10.
2. If the disc hits an object that is out of bounds, it's a turnover at the spot where it went out of bounds, not where it hit the object.
3. When there is a score, or when there is a turnover in the endzone in the endzone, the disc is put into play from that spot. It is not walked up to the goalline.
4. If the disc lands or rolls out of the endzone, then the play is restarted on the goalline

Aside from rules, there is the change in strategy from outdoor to indoor. After a crap-load of ultimate this summer, it was very strange to play indoor. No wind means that swilly throws are always in play, and of course everyone starts to pull out the hammer.

There is also the change in field size. While Field B is wider than CC Sabathia, Fields A and C are much narrower, so it will be important to maintain a solid structure when making cuts. On offense we'll be running a 3-3 Horizontal.

As we have learned from experience, there are some keys to success in the indoor game. Cuts should be timed well to maximize openness without cutting others off. As well, cutters should try to keep into their lanes. Also, since it's speedpoint, everyone should always be running hard and subbing quickly. If you're not running...sub off!

As we'll be running a Ho, it is imperative that we get the disc off of the sideline. If we have the disc within 10 feet of the forced sideline (unless there is an open upfield pass right away), we should be looking to swing the disc to get it off the line. This will open up the field, get more cutters involved with the play, allow the Ho stack to fluorish, and minimize any dangers of hitting the mesh/lights.

Finally, we should try to keep the disc moving as much as possible. Lots of passes keeps the defense on their heels. Obviously, we'll pull out the long bombs (especially with Frogger on the team), but we should try to play an up-tempo style, which I think suits our speed and overall team hustle.

Tonight we begin play with Tony and Carmel, one of the strongest teams in the league. Let's work hard and start off the season with a big upset victory!

No Birds Allowed?

I was catching up at Idea Drunk, and saw a great post from a couple of weeks ago (not many words, lots of pictures...my kind of reading).

There are a couple cool pictures, including one that looks like a girl coming out of a Stargate. But there is one picture that I'm calling shenanigans on:

There is no way this is a real sign. Not possible. I don't believe it for a second. Why not? Have you ever seen a "No birds allowed" sign before? No. You know why? Because they don't exist!

For one, look at the sign. If you notice, it is exactly the same shape as the seagull, including the part at the tail that has the feathers sticking up, which isn't always the case. Also, look at the legs: if you were going to make this sign, are you really going to go through the trouble of making sure the bird's knees (or whatever they are) are detailed like that?

Even if you think a sign like that is real, in which situation would it be used? Is someone bringing their pet birds to this part of town? "Damn, I was hoping to bring Squawkie down to the beach today for some fun and swimming, but look at the sign. Shit. I guess we have to go back to our weekly visits to the dump." I don't think so. I know there are some weird pets out there, but come on, a seagull?

Well, if it's not directed at humans, then it can only be there as a notice for birds. But if that is the case then...um...what? They're birds. They can't read. Or understand signs. If they could, wouldn't this sign be all over Trafalgar Square?

I can just picture it...

Bird 1 - "Hey Celeste, what are you up to?"
Bird 2 - "Not much Withrow...I'm hungry, so I was thinking of heading to the beach and stealing someone's hot dog while they weren't looking."
Withrow - "That sounds like fun. Mind if I come? The crazy bread lady didn't show up at the park this morning, so I'm hungry too."
Celeste - "Sure, no problem...let's go."

- Celeste and Withrow arrive at the beach.

Withrow - "Hey, look at that kid, he's totally going to drop his sandwich. Ready to go in?"
Celeste - "Whoa, wait a minute Withrow, look at that sign. It says that we aren't allowed here."
Withrow - "What the...? Really? Oh come on. I've been coming here for years! THIS IS BULLSHIT!!"
Celeste - "Hey man, don't blame me, I'm just a bird who can comprehend what that sign says somehow."
Withrow - "Goddammit. First they kick us out of the subway stations, now this. This fucking city makes me sick. You know how much more garbage there would be on the streets if it wasn't for us? I am so going to write a letter to the editor about this."
Celeste - "I hear ya. Want to go poop on Dave Winfield's car instead?"
Withrow - "Oh, you always know how to cheer me up...I fucking hate that asshole."
Celeste - "Let's book."

My Electoral Paradox

With today being the Federal Election, obviously I have to go cast my vote after work. However, my choice is not as simple as voting for the candidate who I think would be best to lead Canada.

Because of our system of government, the choice in my riding comes down to voting between the NDP and Liberal candidates. The Conservative candidate has always been a lost cause in this riding...I don't even know who it is this year (not like I'd vote for them anyway). As for Green...ask me again in 10 years when they might actually be viable as a party.

And this is where my Electoral Paradox comes in. My preference is to vote for Olivia Chow, the NDP candidate. But, if I do that, I am voting against a Liberal, Christine Innes, with a good chance of winning, thus (theoretically) weakening the Liberals' numbers. So for me, a vote for the NDP is a vote for the Conservatives and sweater boy. And I can't be a part of that.

[Of course, if I vote for Innes, then I'm voting for the Liberals...and Stephane Dion. Ugh. He exites me about as much as the propects of getting a colonoscopy.]

So that's my conundrum, which is probably similar to what everyone else is facing today (well...the 65% of us, that is).

It probably doesn't really matter though. We all know that the zombies will be coming for us shortly...

It's on

Dear person who I beat in the Fantasy Hockey Pool last year,

I think you are mistaken about the tiebreakers....I didn't have Sidney Crosby on my team last year (zing!).

You're going down harder than Big Fish after one of my motivational speeches.

Sincerely, 

The two-time champion of the Springfield Shinny League.

Who knew that Homer Simpson was coaching Sarah Palin?

Normally I'm not one to comment on politics, but as I was flipping through the channels on my way to watching more important things (i.e. the baseball playoffs) I stopped by the American Vice-Presidential Debate.

And that's when I discovered that perhaps Sarah Palin and I have something in common: watching the Simpsons and Family Guy.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Officer: Next weekend, we're having our annual war games. Now Simpson, because of your many years as a nuclear technician, we're putting you on a nuclear sub.
Homer: "Nuc-u-lar". It's pronounced "nuc-u-lar".
Officer: Oh, whatever.
Homer: "Nuc-u-lar".

And now here is someone who could potentially be President of United States of America:

I'm super serial

It's been almost two weeks since the Hounds went home disappointed from the Monday Playoffs, and I've been spending all that time trying to figure out what went wrong.  Seriously, I haven't gone to work, played Rock Band, or even made sandwiches since that fateful Saturday in my quest to understand what the hell went wrong.

Well, after reviewing the game tapes, interviewing numerous witnesses, consulting Psychic Nikki and howling at the moon for 5 nights in a row, I believe I have found the reason why we lost.

Now, some may say that the short roster did us in.  Or that we were missing some key players.  Perhaps people have told you that we just didn't have "it" that day while Disc Horde just played better than us.

Those people are stupid.

The answer is so obvious that I can't believe no one figured it out at the time.  The reason why we lost is due to the most diabolically evil creature on the earth.  It is the single greatest threat to our planet.  I'm talking of course, about...

MANBEARPIG

Consequences of switching nights

As the TUC Playoffs approach, I'm sure everyone is getting mentally prepared for Saturday.  Me, I'm watching the final scene of The Karate Kid over and over.  (One thing I don't understand from that movie is how a punch to the face is illegal, but a kick to the face is perfectly fine.  It makes about as much sense as the popularity of that awful band Hedley.)

But, let's look ahead to next summer for a quick moment. 

There has been talk of moving to Wednesday next year, which I think is a great idea. Right off the top of my head, I can think of a few reasons why we should:

- better competition

- no long weekend games

- time to recover from the weekend

But it's never that easy, as there would be repercussions if we moved days.  There would be some roster issues as some people are already on a team on Wednesday (stupid Berzurk!).  Plus, would the changing of the night that the Hounds get down to business affect Business Time?

Just something that you probably hadn't considered.

A much better All-Star Game than the Pro Bowl

In the morning of Saturday, September 14th, TUC is hosting the Scally's Cup All-Star Challenge at BMO Field.  Hopefully this All-Star game will be better than the major pro sports' games (because it's entirely realistic to compare a local flatball league to professional sports...).  

Here are my current rankings:

4)  Football - For football players, the Pro Bowl is a bonus cheque and a free trip to Hawaii for the family.  If not for those two things, no one would ever go, and it shows in the game.

3)  Basketball - Even with the Slam Dunk Contest enjoying a bit of a creative renaissance, the game itself is horr-awful (to borrow Shaq's phrase).  It's basically a showcase for hoisting up 3's, loads of turnovers, and practicing alley-oops while the defense watches (or moves out of the way).  

2)  Hockey - A lot of what makes hockey exciting (the speed, intensity and body-checking) is lost in this glorified game of shinny.  At least the goalies are trying to keep the score respectable, even if that is like Big Fish trying to cover Joel, Tien, Bonnie or Christian in the endzone; scoring is inevitable.  But at least the NHL ASG gave us Owen Nolan vs Dominik Hasek:

1) Baseball - How sad is it that the best All-Star Game is the one that felt the need to justify itself as "counting" for home-field advantage in the World Series?  But at least the players actually do try, whereas in the other leagues they are just going through the motions.  But MLB, don't push some contrived notion to make the game seem more important than it really is.

So, the Scally's Cup doesn't have to give us much to be the best All-Star Game around.  I just hope it's taken seriously, unlike the one at Gender Blender.  The GB game is definitely a different monster though, so I have high hopes it won't be like that.

Players will be chosen based on nominations.  Hopefully our 10-2-1 record will translate into a couple of players selected.  But we need to do our part, and should suggest some worthy candidates.  Some people who I was thinking of are:

Yoink - Adrian, Ryan, Sarah

4D - Chee, Matt

Disc Horde - Shimmy, Dan, Maria

5E - I think his name is Sachin

Ventura Wu - Sue

Mandrew - sorry, you need to show up to more than 1 out of 3 games

Any thoughts on who we should/should not nominate?

My admittedly garbage Nationals preview

As we all know, CUC 2008 is taking place this week. As is becoming a tradition, the Hounds will be well-represented: Carla and Connie will be playing with Lotus; Bonnie, Nat, Sarah and Frogger will be kicking ass with Tundra, Lyanne will be trying to lead Big Hammers to an improvement on their 7th place finish last year...and Tien will be working on his anger management with Roy.

Play well, have fun, and bring back some shiny medals!

Now, as much as I like to act like I know everything, I actually don't. Please, don't be so shocked...it's true. So, with the bar being set really low, here are my somewhat-but-not-really-informed Nationals Predictions:

Mixed

Does anyone else think that Ontario got a bit of the shaft with these seedings? I mean, I know that most teams stunk up the joint at Mixed Up, but the top seed is Monster with the 8th seed. Really? Last year there were 4 teams from Ontario in the top 8, so this year if seeds hold there will be one. I disagree. Although that's because I am going to totally crap over the Alberta and Prairie teams (who I know nothing about).

Pool A looks pretty simple with TFP and Monster likely to finish 1-2, unless TFP loses its focus after winning the Worlds. Swarm will finish third, which could be the highlight of their tournament. Don't worry about Wannabego.

Pool B is where Tundra is, and they have a tough road ahead of them as the 15th seed. They have championship contenders Gecko as the top seed, Saskquatch (I wonder where they are from?) and the always solid Mayhem. Gecko takes the pool easily, and I'm calling Mayhem and Tundra to take down the farmers. I think Tundra will really have to come out firing and utilize their women and height against Mayhem. If they can stop Mayhem's flow, they can take second in the pool, which would be great considering not much will be expected of them coming in.

Pool C looks like the Group of Death, with Psychoplastique (AB #1), RIP, Clearcut (BC #2) and Big Hammers all with legitimate claims to the top seed. Anyone in this pool could finish first or last, so I'm going to say it ends up being RIP, Big Hammers, Clearcut and Psychoplastique, in that order. I don't expect anyone to escape this pool with a 3-0 record.

Pool D is Onyx's for the taking, and 2nd likely comes down to who wins the Liquid/Bronco game in the morning. I don't see good things in BFC's future...I think they are a solid team, but I think others will rise above them. Although they could surprise and nab the 3rd spot on their experience from last year (yeah, I'm hedging a bit).

Quarterfinals - I'm going to go with TFP, Monster, Onyx, Liquid, Gecko, RIP, Big Hammers and Clearcut as the final 8, with TFP and Gecko meeting in the finals. That's right, I'm really going out on a limb to predict the top two seeds make the finals!!

I think Tundra will finish around 10th (although I'm really hoping for top 8), and if they do better, it's because Bonnie got mad at someone and took over.

[As an aside:

Dear Ontario teams,

Please do well and place as many teams in the top 8 as possible.

Sincerely,

Me

Given the number of touring teams in the province (especially compared to every other region) we need as many bids as possible for Nats. If Snipe beat Gecko last year on Day 2, Ontario gets another bid and Zen makes it to Nationals. Just sayin'...]

Women's

Unlike Mixed where a case could be made for half the teams to win the whole enchilada, Women's looks like it doesn't quite have that same depth. I see Stella, Storm and Lotus (as long as they take Bushfire seriously) taking their respective pools, leading to an all-Ontario final that will be the closest final of the day. If I have to make a choice, I'll say that Stella takes it on universe point over Lotus. PPF and Bushfire are my darkhorse picks.

Open

Last year Invictus finished third behind Furious and Goat (they almost beat Goat on Day 2). So, not seeing either of those two teams playing this week, plus the fact that Invictus will be playing at home, I'm calling them to win it over Nomads from BC. Phoenix might surprise and make the finals. Then again, they might not.

I don't envision anyone seeded 9th and lower moving into the top 8. If Roy beats it's 12 seed, that means they had a good tournament.

Juniors

I have no clue, so I'm just going to say that the BC kids beat the Toronto kids again this year.

Masters

All I know about Masters is that when your team is seeded 3rd, and your leaders see me in a bar 3 days before the tournament begins and ask if I'm old enough to play, then your team is probably in trouble. So, don't expect much from Fossil this week.

It doesn't really matter, GLUM will win, probably over Figjam.

-------------------------------------------------

So, there you have my predictions. I'm curious to see how close I end up . Although, with no posts up yet on the esteemed sites (Cultimate, Canadian Ultimate) or even the non-esteemed ones (cough *Big Fish guy's blog* cough) these could be the definitive prognostications for CUC 2008.

Does that make my guesses sound more valid? No? Oh well...that's what I figured.

Good luck Hounds!

To whom it may concern

Dear Mandrew,

Boo.

Sincerely,
Release the Hounds

Slip Sliding Away

After a fun weekend, we get back to business tonight as we take on 4D for the second time this season. Last time they got 10 points...let's make sure they get less this time.

The game is at Caledonia Park, at Lawrence and Caledonia (on top of the hill). Be there by 6:30pm.

And now for my new segment, CHEERS AND JEERS:

CHEERS

To Joel and Steph for hosting the weekend.

JEERS

To Nat, for not coming.

CHEERS

To the awesome Slip & Slide (or "large sheet of plastic facing down a hill", since it wasn't an actual Slip & Slide).

JEERS

To the hole at the bottom of the aforementioned Slip & Slide, which wrenched my flickin' thumb backwards. It's pretty sore, but I should still be able to play. Just no thumb-wrestling for me for awhile.

New Jersey wasn't as good as Slippery When Wet

Tonight we're playing against Disc Horde, a team that we beat earlier this season 17-10. We'll be at the new Field Turf fields at Downsview Park, so they won't be as affected by all the rain we've been having.

In more important news, we are hoping to get our new jerseys tonight. I have seen the design, so I'll give a little inspiration without ruining anything:

As long as it's ready for me to pick up from VC today, I'm definitely looking forward to getting the new jersey tonight . Much moreso than this New Jersey:

Not that the album is that bad, it just wasn't Slippery When Wet, which was a monster (Livin' on a Prayer AND Wanted Dead or Alive). Of course, the New Jersey album does have a song that definitely does NOT apply to Simon this Summer.

Hounds on the Beach?

I'm sure most of you have had enough of me telling stories about my trip to the Philippines, when I stumbled upon the Boracay Dragons ultimate team and was able to join in their scrimmages.  Well, it's time for the Hounds to storm the beach, and I'm not referring to sandbagging teams playing the mini 5's league.

 If you ever check out the BULA blog in my Blogroll (it's on computers now), you would have seen this recent story about the Boracay Dragons winning a tournament last month.  They have become THE team to beat on the beach.  Here is the video covering their most recent victory (including a scary meeting of the minds):

I propose that we attempt to slay the dragons and take a Hounds team to the Philippines to play in the Boracay Open.  That's right...a Hounds Balikbayan team.  

I have touched base with my friend Junthir in Boracay about the possibility of bringing a team over, and he's very excited to help us out.  He's not sure when exactly the tournament will take place, as in the past it's been March or May.  I suggested March would be better for us, so it won't affect those with touring aspirations, or the start of the TUC season.  I think he'll do his best to ensure that happens.

I'm guessing the cost would be in the $2500-$3000 range, with the biggest cost of course being airfare.  Junthir can probably help us get a good deal on a hotel (or find places for us to stay), and food and drink is ridiculously cheap compared to Canada.  When I was there, 1 beer cost about 40 cents.  Seriously.  I've got $5...let's go get drunk.

So...who's interested?  We can see who's in from the Hounds, and then find others.  It's a 4-on-4 tournament, so we'd only need about 10 players.  

This could be a part of a larger vacation for people (i.e. visiting relatives in a neighbouring country), so it doesn't have to be all about Boracay, although there's definitely nothing wrong with that.

Either way, I'd love to do more of this next year:

Alligator Lizards in the air

The most important game of our lives is this Monday as we play Ventura Wu at 6:30pm at Vaughan Road Academy (not at Sunnybrook).

Why is it the most important game? Shut up, that's why.

Simon has guaranteed* that he will be coming to the game, so we have that to look forward to. We should also plan on hitting up Scallywags afterward since we're sort of in the neighbourhood (plus it's half-priced food).

This game kinda reminds me of a song by America...

Did you know that in this song the "Alligator Lizards" America is referring to are actually flatballs? It's a little known fact that America was into the ultimate scene, and one day while throwing the disc around, Dan Peek was trash-talking Dewey Bunnell's throwing into the wind: "You're throwing worse than an alligator, or a lizard...yeah, you suck worse than an Alligator Lizard."

Even though it didn't make any sense, somehow it stuck in their group, and they then referred to any swilly throws as "Alligator Lizards". When they wrote "Ventura Highway" later that year, that term fit in the song much better than "Frisbees".

*not a guarantee

Update from Simon:

"Folks,
Just had a babysitter drop out, so won't be able to join you until Olympia's home...but being within 5 mins of Scallywags and our first chance to use half price food, I'll be pushing for some post-game eating whatever happens!"

This is why I put the asterisk for Simon's guarantee. He's dangerously close to getting the Christian treatment on the blog.

I just wanna go to the rooftops and scream: Hounds beat Mandrew!!!!

Remember at the end of "The Karate Kid" when Daniel fought Johnny for the All-Valley Under-18 Karate Championships? After getting beat up for months, he finally defeated his nemesis and earned his respect at the same time. It was amazing! Who else wasn't cheering on Daniel when he went into the "Crane" stance? I mean who else besides Christian, who was 1 when this movie was released...

Ok, so that's about the opposite of how we reacted on Monday.

After two really, really bad losses last year, (and after two false starts this year), this past Monday the Hounds played, and finally beat, the venerable Monday team Mandrew. Even though 8 players had been busting their asses at Regionals, we managed to bring enough energy (and subs) to turn a 9-8 deficit at half in to a 17-12 victory.

Was it me, or were we as excited for that win as we were when we beat MOB in the winter? Seriously...this team kicked our asses last year...twice! Let's how some enthusiasm!

We will definitely have to watch out for them later as they are quite pissed off now. Plus, they were missing some of their key players.

Best comment at the lunch table at work on Tuesday

Me, to Rol: "Don' worry. Half of your team was tired from playing Regionals this weekend. Oh wait...that was us."

Perhaps that didn't help the whole "pissed off" thing. But c'mon, it was funny...

Bonnie can now retire (not really)

Where else can you go after hand-blocking an Olympic Gold medalist twice?

Then and now

Do you remember the time last year when Mandrew zoned us and we kept screwing up? Do you remember the time on Monday when they tried to zone us and we ripped through it faster than a 6-year-old tears through his Christmas presents? Do you remember the time when Michael Jackson released the "Remember the Time" video and it was showed on Fox? What a self-indulgent piece of garbage that was. Ooh, you kissed Iman and turned into sand...good for you...

From the makers of "Where's Waldo?"

Where's Simon?

[Hint: not at Eglinton Flats]

Canada Day excitement

Sometimes, I love where I live.

One of the best parts about my location is that every May 24 and Canada Day I have a great view of the fireworks at Ontario Place (not to mention all the Joe Schmo fireworks throughout the city).

It's like my own personal Feist video...except for the cute little Indie singer (apparently that's going to be a part of Phase 3).

The worst part about where I live: zombie attacks.

In actual RTH news

Since Ventura Wu would prefer to lounge around and relax at the cottage instead of getting their butts whooped by us, we (and when I say "we", I mean "I") had to find another opponent for Monday.

Luckily, Yoink is going to be around and also was without someone to play.  So, like eharmony, TUC used their two dimensions of compatibility (plays on Mondays; needs an opponent) to match us up.

More importantly, Pierre will be coming out to relive his Hounds (and maybe Beach) glory days.  Hopefully he has his cleats, because we could use a few more ill-advised hammers in our game.

Irish Car Bombs to follow.  Hopefully you have the day off on Tuesday.

Release the Hounds vs Yoink - 6:30pm, Eglinton Flats Rugby 9.

Toronto is about to get a lot more awesome

That's right...Pierre is coming for a visit.  As mentioned a few weeks ago, he is going to be in town from Wednesday to Tuesday.  Anyone know any more details than that?

Hopefully he can make it out to the game on Monday and watch (perhaps play?) us destroy Ventura Wu.  Of course, this has to be followed by wings, ribs, beer and Irish Car Bombs after the game.

We're never going to play Mandrew are we?

There must be some cosmic force at work that doesn't want us to play Mandrew.  A big storm on Monday afternoon forced TUC called off games.  That's two games against Mandrew that haven't happened yet.  One day we'll play them...one day.

Of course, since 9 Hounds were playing at Northern Flights, we were about as disappointed with this ruling as Tien is when a plate full of wings is placed in front of him.  So, we were kind of like Garbage, if only for one day.

I'm itchy

Game tonight: 6:30 at Eglinton Flats Rugby #9

We're playing against the best competition on Mondays; Mandrew.

I can't really think of much more to say about our game tonight, because I'm too distracted from scratching all of my bug bites from playing in North Bay this weekend.

Apparently tears are not enough.

Also, yours truly made the North Bay Nugget. Had they asked me the same questions on Sunday, I would have had a much different response. So many things were missing (like, the TD and the schedules at the start of the day), it was like they forgot it was a 2-day tournament.

Will we see the Hounds Hard Hat?

Release the Hounds is playing against 4D tonight at 7pm at BMO 2 (East side).

We played them last year (and won...take that, bitches!). While most of us are tired from Experiencing Summer, 4D was also playing at Sunnybrook this weekend, so hopefully they will be equally tired.

Afterwards, rumour has it we might be going out for a post-game meal. But I don't like to start rumours*, so you didn't hear that from me.

Thanks to the democratic process, one of the Wongs has been chosen to pick up the hard hat. While they did actually tie in the vote with Pierre, apparently Pierre is too lazy to fly over from France to pick that up for us. What a jerkstore.

* Christian wets his bed.

Exhaustion setting in

Get it? It's a Hound, and he's tired!

Oh Gender Blender. You were so much fun; at least the parts that I can remember. But now I'm stuck at my desk, and I can feel my legs tightening and my liver rebelling with every email that arrives in my Inbox.

[Turn your sarcasm detectors on]

So, there's nothing I'd rather do tonight than play my 8th game in 3 days.

"My God, this baby is off the charts!"

See you tonight at 7:00 at BMO. We play Disc Horde. We beat them twice last year. They haven't lost yet this year. Let's change that. Why are my sentances so short?

The Superfreak from the Goonies previews tonight's game

Thank you Sloth, for that insightful and thorough commentary on tonight's matchup.

Release the Hounds vs Superfreaks
Sunnybrook East Cricket, 6:30pm.

Anyone up for going to watch the Wings clinch the Stanley Cup afterwards?

What did you call us?

Did you hear that?  Ventura just called us losers.  Are we gonna take that?

Release the Hounds vs Ventura Wu; 6:30,  Earl Haig SS 

Be there at 6:30 (6:15 if you haven't thrown outside since August).  

By the way, notable Earl Haig alumni include Tennis player Daniel Nestor and actors Neve Campbell, Paul Gross, Sarah Polley and Degrassi's Snake, Stefan Brogren.  

I figured that was information that you just had to know for the game.

As called

When the Hounds last played on real grass, we finished last summer's regular season with a tie against the 7th-best-team-in-the-country (and eventual Monday champs) Big Hammers. This capped 9-4-2 season which saw us rise from 14th to 4th in the Monday Ladder.  

Of course, since then we won the Monday Winter Competitive Indoor League...not too shabby.

This year it looks like we're going into the season amongst the top-ranked teams (are the seedings accurate, or are the 1-5 teams random?  If so, we're 2nd to Mandrew.). I guess this means we're not that "young, up-and-coming team" anymore...

This year TUC is separating the Comp from the Int/Rec teams, so we have 13 other teams in our division.  Here is what my in-depth research has turned up:

Mandrew - After winning the whole enchilada the past few years, they lost to Big Hammers in the finals last year.  They are the team to beat, but they are also a year older from last year.  If they were dogs, that might mean more since 1 human year is like 7 dog years.  Of course, we're also a year older than last year, so I guess that doesn't really mean anything.  They beat us twice last year, so let's try to do better, ok?

Ninjastars_Mon - We played them last year and didn't do too well.  Tough team to call this year; it'll depend which of their Monsters (if any) come out from week to week.

Disc Horde - We also played them twice last year (and won, woo-hoo!), but they look like they've picked up some pretty good players, so we'll have to watch out for them.

Ventura Wu - This is all I can think of when I see the name "Ventura"...

Let's (figuratively) beat them like that...

kookaburras - Someone was once impressed because I knew that a Kookaburra is an

Australian bird.  The only reason I knew was because I played cricket in high school and Kookaburra is a cricket equipment company with a bird as their logo.

By the way, tea time is very under-appreciated in sports.  We should definitely bring it in to the ultimate scene.  Screw spirit games...I want tea time...

El Kabong - Another team we played last year who appears to have picked up some new players.  Luckily guitars are not accepted on the ultimate field.

D.I.R.T. - A true up-and-coming team; Toronto's Juniors squad.  Sure, they may be young, fast, fit, athletic, have a coach...um...but at least we can go out for beers afterwards before having to go home to families/jobs/responsibilities.  Yeah, take that, DIRT; we know you're jealous of us.

4D - The last of the teams that we played last summer, and another team that will likely be better than last year.  

B.O.M. (Barrel of Monkeys) - According to Wikipedia: "One monkey arouses a great deal of amusement. Two or more then double the interest and amusement. If one were to release a barrel full of monkeys, we must suppose that their antics would become hilariously comical."  

Let's be sure to kick their hilariously comical asses.

As an aside, if I were a monkey and stuck in a barrel with a bunch of other poop-flingers, hilariously comical is probably not the best term to describe how I would feel about my situation.

Superfreaks - I don't know anything about this team, but the name reminds me of the time my family drove across the country so my sister could take part in some sort of kiddie-beauty pageant.  It was quite the experience and even though she didn't win, but she tried her best and afterwards my family was closer than ever.  Luckily there were some cameras there to capture the moment:

Flick Fu - The best comment from Zen tryouts belongs to Andrew H, who recalled when we killed Flick Fu in the Winter 2007 league that we played at Varsity: "The Hounds totally should become a touring team."  What do you think, Simon?  

Anyway, I don't know if we could use the Hounds name to tour...we might have to come up with another name.  Let me check my hair dryer to see if I can think of one...

5E - Are these guys making fun of 4D?  If so, that's awesome.  If not, meh...

Oxygen Hazard - Is this team made up of the martians

from Mars Attacks?  Is that why Oxygen is a hazard?  If that's the case, then I'm more concerned about their ray guns than anything they can actually do on the field.  Did you see those things?  If you get shot, you get disintegrated immediately.  That would totally suck.

Alright, so that's everyone that we could be playing this summer.  I figure the teams that we'll really have to look out for are Mandrew, Disc Horde and Ninjastars.  Of course, we'll see how things play out when the games begin.

Also of note is the pending return of Pierre in late June.  Let's be sure to be at the top of the ladder when he returns.

A few questions going into the season:

1) What's going on with the Mandrew game?  Are we taking the default, or going to reschedule?

2) Are we getting uniforms?  For VC shirts, I'm a Men's Small.  Just sayin'...

3) For those who are touring; will we let tournaments tire us out for Hounds games?  Let's all agree not to let that happen, okay?  Okay.

One more week

The best part is, I don't even have to procrastinate since we aren't playing Monday.  You know, since Mandrew can't field a team on Monday even though TUC has been starting the season on the long weekend for years.

Hopefully this weekend I'll come up with some sort of funny season preview.  Or what most of you will call it: a season preview.

And because it's been far too long since I should have posted this song suggestion from Dan; ladies and gentlemen: the Mooney Suzukis, who have obviously heard of us...

Lookin' for some shelter
Lookin' for some peace
The fire in the furnace
Been burnin' like the beast
My pants have all been pressed
All my collars neatly creased
My ride bummin' thumb is up
Cause now the hounds have been released

Release the Hounds!

I'll be back

Since the Hounds won't be playing for another month, there will likely be a lull here.  Sorry, but I'm not sure if I have the time to post while I'm trying to achieve enlightenment.

Of course, there are always Bonnie's, Christian's and Hamid's sites to visit, plus here are some old favourite posts of mine.

That's right, it's a cheesy clip show, but in blog form:

As Bonners called it, the Hounds Book of Genesis

Steve Sullivan and karma

Hounds closed due to falling ice (Austin also gets inspired from American Beauty)

I still think this commercial sucks

The OK Go video

I love this song.  Thank you Tien for giving me an excuse to post it.

Pierre's final game; I get cheesy

End of Season party, with Paper Plate Awards

In case I don't post right away when the Summer season starts in May

Christian's Bud Light parody...perhaps that was why he didn't get traded

That kick-ass Hounds on Ice song, which was key to our Snowplate victory

I complain about my height mojo

The Hounds win Winter, but unfortunately the commenters remind us of karaoke

Next Hounds game: Monday, May 19th.  Don't forget, it's a holiday Monday.

Sweep!

At BMO

Obviously the big news is that Release the Hounds won the Monday Competitive Championship on Friday with a convincing 7-point victory over the Disciples of Love. Thus completed the most dominating title run since whenever the last Women's hockey tournament that Canada played in. Taking away the 6-0 default win, we won our games by an average of 19 points. But I think more impressive was limited our opponents to an average of 12 points per game.

As someone noted, it's like we were the Patriots, except that we actually won all of our games.

At the SkyDome Rogers Centre

Friday night was a busy night, as Christian and I attended the Blue Jays home opener against the Red Sox. Shaun Marcum was on fire as he struck out 8 over 7 innings. Unfortunately, we had to leave after the seventh inning, but at least we were able to see the Jays, rocking their kick-ass powder blue uniforms take the lead (which they would not relinquish). Of course, after we left there was a fight in the stands a few sections away from our seats, plus a couple of quasi-streakers before the final out. Also, I didn't get drunk.

You're welcome.

The Blue Jays had strong pitching all weekend, and Frank Thomas drove in 8 runs as they swept the Red Sox. It's still early, but it's nice to see such a strong showing right out of the gate.

For better Blue Jays analysis, there are quite a few sites out there, and I have found these two to be excellent ones:

1) The Mockingbird - This is written by a friend of mine, although I think it is just his excuse for constantly using pitch f/x. It's a site that analyzes things like batting slumps and success, pitcher's great or Towers-esque starts, and bad umpiring. All while mixing in a healthy dose of sarcasm.

2) Drunk Jays Fans - This could be the most appropriately named site since Hot Chicks with Douchebags. Considering they usually are drunk when they post, they know their shit, and are fucking hilarious. I have to swear when describing it because...well, just check it out.

TUC BBS threads that I did not write

I found this one to be amusing. All I can say is this: aren't we all, Leroy...aren't we all...

Read the labels!

So, apparently some of you forgot what day it was yesterday when reading my post. You also didn't read the label below the post. It's too bad, because I think the labels are just as funny as the rest of my posts...

Anyways, rumours of my desertion of the Hounds have been greatly exaggerated...by me. I'm still planning on winning the Monday Summer league with the Hounds.

So, for those who were fooled by yesterday's post, I have someone here who doesn't want to pity you, but probably will anyway.

A sad announcement

It is with deep sadness that I write today's post. No, I don't regret the total smackdown we laid on the Ultimate Volleyball Team last night. It's something else.

It looks like this is going to be my last season with the Hounds.

Because of my responsibilities with work, Touring and my new Rock Band obsession, something has to give, and it looks like it's going to be Hounds.

It's been an awesome three years playing with you all. I can't believe it's almost been three years since we played our first game.

I hope we can make my last game a memorable one with a Championship win on Friday over the Disciples of Love.

I'm getting sick of Volleyball

We're playing the Ultimate Volleyball Team again (10pm, BMO C). The first time we played them, we won 41-11. The second time we played them, they defaulted (so, 6-0 win for us). I expect the score for tonight to be somewhere in between those two.

As for the actual game of volleyball, I don't even like to play it. We all know my issues with height and jumping; so the fact that I have to hit the ball over an 8-foot high net right away depresses me. Add to it the sore arms and jammed fingers that result from bumping, passing and blocking, and this is a sport I am happy not to play.

But after seeing this picture, I may change my mind.

TGIF

Because that means we have ultimate tonight.

Yes, due to the TUC/BMO confusion, we play tonight against Slam Dunks at 11pm. Nice to see our top ranking got us this illustrious time slot. I'm glad too, because it's not like some of us have to get up at 6:30 tomorrow morning to run a Beach Dodgeball Tournament or anything.

I have no idea who Slam Dunks are, but I'm sure they are nice people who don't deserve the beating they are going to get tonight.

For those of you looking to do something beforehand, Bonners is hosting a carpal tunnel workshop Guitar Hero night at her place.

This is almost where I am at for my music knowledge...other than the 30 minutes listening to the radio in the car on the way to and from work. And even that ends up being pretty much just the Hip, Rush and [insert new Canadian band here].

Guys with more hops than me

I will be the first to admit that I can't jump very high. Combine this with the fact that I'm short, and, well, let's just say that Dwight Howard doesn't need to worry about me taking his Slam Dunk title away from him.

This is why I secretly hate Joel. Sure, Joel is a great guy and teammate, but not only is he tall enough that he doesn't need to stand on a chair to change a lightbulb, he can also jump through the roof. It is very annoying. That is why I am funding a project to travel back in time to steal his Height Mojo. I hope it works better than that time I tried to equip sharks with frickin' lasers attached to their heads.

But there are others who I might also target. Like Kansas City Royal Joey Gathright (already known for jumping over cars); who decided that the best way to avoid a tag was to jump OVER a pitcher on his way to first base:



Of course, this has already been done on the ultimate field, by Beau Kittridge of Colorado's Mamabird:



I hate you all.

Different kinds of Easter eggs

Yay! I get to work today! Woohoo!

For those of you who have time (either ot work or at home) here are different kinds of Easter Eggs:



See you tonight when we take on Sasquatch and the Dumpling Gang. Don't forget it's at Varsity.

Hounds > Love

Monday's game left me with an weird feeling. While it's always nice to win, we didn't seem to play very well. What to make of it all?

Well, we did manage to shut them out for awhile (10-0!), which is quite the accomplishment against this squad. It's not like we were playing those chokers on Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner... Plus, holding the Disciples to only 13 points is a good effort. So cheers to the defense.

Jeers though must go to the offense, which only managed to score 19 times. What is this, regular point?

Something that I noticed was that the stack was set much too far away. This took away any solid deep threats, while giving their D a chance to catch up to us on our in cuts. How many deep throws did we have? With our speed, we should be trying to set that up more. Even if it isn't there, a deep strike sets up solid continuation passes and easy yardage.

We also went through stretches where everyone was trying to do everything, followed by everyone doing nothing. Perhaps the zone threw us off a bit, although I don't know why it should have. It was a passive zone with a two-man cup. Indoors! We should cut through that like Michael Myers cuts through promiscuous teenagers.

So, let's remember to maintain our stack offense, and play our game. And crush the other team.

Anyone else have any thoughts on the game?

Something you might find interesting

At least I did when I saw this thread on the TUC BBS. I don't know who this Richard K guy is, but I like the cut of his jib.

Christian's poetic question

"What's with the random poll on the side? Are we going for dim sum?
If so, I want to come."

Uh, we're playing Sasquatch and the Dumpling Gang on Monday.  I'm not very creative.

But, if you wanted, we could go for Dim Sum.
And you could eat it, and it would be yum-yum.
Perhaps wash it down with Coke and rum.
But stinky breath; don't forget to bring gum.
Tittie boobie bum bum

Happy St. Patrick's Day

It is quite ironic that we are playing the Disciples of Love on the most romantic day of the year (9pm, BMO).

Romantic that is, if your idea of romance is drunkenly hooking up with that special someone who finds multiple shots of Irish Car Bombs and the resulting questionable attempts at Riverdance-ing to "Home for a Rest" adorable.

Otherwise, it's a messy, messy day. And so is the morning after.

Boo-urns to UVT

No, wait...I was saying "Boo".
Yeah yeah, we're all disappointed that the Ultimate Volleyball Team chose to run and hide rather than face another shellacking. I thought last night would be the night that our +/- would get over 100. It's going to be much tougher to do that next week since we're playing the Disciples of Love.

Although, it did mean that I didn't have to drive all the way to Varsity (as opposed to my 10-minute walk when games are at BMO). Plus, it did allow me to go to bed at a reasonable hour without having to resort to a post-game beer (or six-pack).

In other news:

"Boobie" narrowly beat "Bum bum" and "Tittie" in the poll to determine our funniest word. I was going to use pictures, but I thought I'd keep this site safe for work (sorry pervs!). Use this new information as you see fit.

Another Ultimate Volleyball team

So, we're playing the Ultimate Volleyball Team again.  We played them in the first game of the season, and played pretty well.  There was that whole spirit point thing as well where they gave us a 7; the first non-10 we have gotten in a few years.  However, I noticed in the standings we're back up to an average of 10...Tyler tells me that TUC reset our spirit score from that game.

Last time I talked about my Super Spike V'Ball prowess (which also made it's way into one of The Roman Empire's recent quizzes), but it's tough to compare that to the Top Gun volleyball scene.  Although does anyone really believe that Tom Cruise can spike over that net?

For my own little quiz...what are the call-signs of the 4 players?

My first restaurant review

Since my neighbourhood is still being built up, there aren't a lot of good places to go to get some good  food (although maybe I think I just miss Sneaky Dee's).  However, there is an Irish Pub that opened up across the street from my place, called the Brazen Head.  

I've been there four times, and to be honest, a part of me just doesn't feel it.  The food seems ok on paper, but something just doesn't work.  It's not bad, I guess, just a little heavy.

However, they have nailed two things:

1) The Roasted Red Pepper and Artichoke Dip

And they finally figured out the flatbread proportions.  The first few times there was a lot of dip left with nothing to scoop it with.  It's very annoying when there's dip staring at you and you can't do anything about it.

2) The after-dinner mints

They are these thick Lifesavers mints...spearmint I think...maybe peppermint.  Anyways, they are the best mints I have ever had.  If they have after-dinner mints in heaven, these are them.  Michelle and I always grab as handful extra as we leave.  Unless there is a server watching as we leave.  Then we each grab one.

Oh, make that three things...they also have Mill St. Organic on tap.

So, Brazen Head:  come for the Red Pepper and Artichoke Dip, stay for the mints.

(feel free to use in your testimonials)

Hounds on Ice take Sudbury by storm

And that was just the drive up.

Yes, the drive up was not fun. For Michelle, Julie and I, it was over 8 hours, which included 45 minutes when traffic was stopped as a tractor-trailer had to be towed out of a ditch. But we eventually got to Jay and Diane's, Lyanne's parents.

At 7:30, I, Bonnie, Dan, Frogger, Jess, Joel, Julie, Lyanne, Lynchy, Matt, Michelle, Nat, Sarah, Steph and Tien got up, and were instantly reminded why Jay and Diane rock, as they served a great breakfast, with so many options. After we powered up, it was off to the driving range and Snowplate.

We went in to the tournament seeded fifth (originally 19th!). The fields were a bit small, so we threw out a zone. I believe our females even volunteered to all play cup (awesome!). We won our first two games handily against the Wingnuts and My Mailman works for the Government (fyi: so does my wife). This allowed us to get used to running in the snow, throwing with gloves on, being cold, singing our song, etc...

Our third game brought up against the PULers (aka Prostitutes, Bucket Fish), the top seed in the tournament (1st and 5th seeds in the same division? Curse you cascade seeding!). We took a commanding lead, working the disc throughout their zone. I believe we were up about 10-4, and then the Peterborough squad switched to man; a switch that worked. We had trouble adjusting our offence and they came back to 10-9. Thank jebus for hard cap.

We finished our fourth game easily against the Frozen Frisbyterians to end the day with the top seed. We were looking forward to naps, Guitar Hero (thanks Bonners!), more food, and of course, the hot tub. Especially those who got some extra aches from the day, like Julie (with a hamstring), me (with a calf) and Lyanne (with a Dan). Spaghetti hit the spot, and the Leafs won, thus further ruining their draft pick. Lots of us tried to stay up for the UFC card; most of us failed. Tittie boobie bum bum.

Sunday morning we were again present with a cornucpia of breakfast (smoothies!). So much food, we were almost late! We packed up, thanked Dan's new Mom and Dad one last time, and zoomed back to the fields. Fungus, our first opponents, apparently haven't learned the cardinal Saturday rule: don't get so drunk that you'll be hungover. Left with only 7 players, they kept it close at the beginning, as well as quoted rules that don't exist (5-2...where in the rules?). We got over it and pushed our way to victory.

In the semi-finals we came up against the Hamilton-Toronto hybrid Frost Cause. We won, and it wasn't very close. We were able to check out the PUL'ers win their semi.

In the finals, we switched up our defensive strategy and played man. The game was quite close, as teams both teams made runs and traded points. We took half 8-7, and came out gunning. We played defence as toight as a tiger and played offence with hard cuts, crisp passes and all around aggressiveness. When all was said and done, we won something like 15-10, and we were Snowplate champs!

Didn't someone say before the first game that we should make sure we have fun, but that we also have a good shot at winning?

Some highlights (please add yours in the comments):

Tien organizing the weekend and leading us to victory.

Our zone.

Lyanne lending us her parents for the weekend.

Dan trying to eliminate Lyanne so he can move in.

Floating chips in the hot tub (no chili though)

Julie the Guitar Hero.

Steph and Michelle keeping us company on the sidelines, working the score and taking pictures.

The weather was awesome. Not too cold, slight breeze, sunny...as perfect as you can get for Sudbury in Winter.

Joel's catch against PULers (Frogger: "Keep going!")

Rumble strips on the highway keeping me on the road.

Lynchy, with his usual high percentage of Lynchers, uh, I mean hammers.

Jess causing countless turnovers while marking.

Hummus.

Frogger's beer point.

That game I made all those deep D's.

Laying out in the snow.

Playing the PULers twice (you got lucky cascade seeding...).

Beating the PUL'ers twice.

Matt getting us the Silva/Henderson fight, and explaining what was going on.

Throwing with gloves on.

Sarah constantly running.

The Swiss Chalet victory meal.

Nat almost laying out.

Winning!

If you're friends with Bonners, well then you're friends with me.

Well done Hounds on Ice! Same time next year?